PSA: Please note, this article can be reviewed just for the writing, or for the humor, or both. You decide. If you know a good joke, leave it in the comments. I am always looking for new materials.
If careful calculation is correct, this is the third time I have written about humor, the power, the majesty, and the gut-splitting good times humor provides. Oddly enough, I am a big fan of dad jokes, but not a dad. I prefer humor that is funny for the fun, not the shocking or profane, merely a good laugh. Of the funniest songs I have ever heard, Arthur Freed and Nacio Herb Brown take the top billing with the song, “Make ‘em Laugh.” Cole Porter also tickled my funny bone with a similar song, “Be a Clown.” However, since I detest clowns, I cannot like this song very much. Both songs are linked for your listening and watching pleasure. Do you find clowns creepy in the Stephen King kind of creepy?
One of the truths about humor is embedded in the lyrics of Make ‘em laugh:
Cosmo:
Though the world is so full of a number of things,
I know we should all be as happy as
But are we?
No, definitely no, positively no.
Decidedly no. Mm mm.
Short people have long faces and
Long people have short faces.
Big people have little humor
And little people have no humor at all!
And in the words of that immortal buddy
Samuel J. Snodgrass, as he was about to be lead
To the guillotine:
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em laugh
Don’t you know everyone wants to laugh?
(Ha ha!)
My dad said, “Be an actor, my son
But be a comical one
They’ll be standing in lines
For those old honky tonk monkeyshines.”
Now you could study Shakespeare and be quite elite
And you can charm the critics and have nothin’ to eat
Just slip on a banana peel
The world’s at your feet
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em…
Make ’em laugh
Don’t you know everyone wants to laugh
My grandpa said go out and tell ’em a joke
But give it plenty of hoke
Make ’em roar
Make ’em scream
Take a fall
But a wall
Split a seam
You start off by pretending
You’re a dancer with grace
You wiggle ‘till they’re
Giggling all over the place
And then you get a great big custard pie in the face
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em laugh
Don’t you know… all the…wants..?
My dad…
They’ll be standing in lines
For those old honky tonk monkeyshines
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em laugh
Don’t you know everyone wants to laugh?
Ah ha ha ha ha ha há
Ah ha ha ha ha ha
Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Make ’em laugh, ah ah!
Make ’em laugh, ah ah!
Make ’em laugh, ah ah!
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em laugh
Make ’em laugh!
“Don’t you know that everyone wants to laugh?” There is much truth in this line, but laughing is a choice. We choose what to laugh at, decide when to laugh, and choose, with the resulting consequences, what is found humorous. The first time I saw the movie “Singing in the Rain,” from whence the song “Make ‘em laugh” originated, I thought this song was ridiculous. Recently I saw the movie again, and this song was hilariously funny and laughed so hard I cried. What changed; certainly wasn’t the movie which was made in 1952; the acting had not changed, the actors are dead; I changed. The first time I saw this movie, I was exhausted after prepping for a holiday meal, I was strung out from too much work, and nothing was funny. This last time, I had changed mentally and physically, which made all the difference.
What is the lie in the song “Make ‘em Laugh?” Simply put, nobody can make you emote if you choose not to, a powerful lesson indeed. I grew up in a big family, and there are seven of us kids; my uncle brought his four and then had a couple more, aunts, uncles, cousins, and more if you took the Salisbury family, those still living could still essentially fill a couple of venues. My older brother was always trying to “make you laugh.” He failed for many reasons; the first was I never thought he was funny.
My older brother could take a joke I laughed at and kill the joke in the retelling. I never met another person so anxious to make people laugh and like him, who failed so completely and miserably. Take the funniest joke you know, put that joke in my older brother’s mouth, and that joke will fall flat, and you will wonder why it was funnier previously. It never ceases to amaze me how this person can kill a joke, especially when he is such a joke himself.
Long have I maintained the following formula:
[(Dark Humor + Intelligent Humor + a Warped sense of Humor) (Shaken not stirred)] = Me laughing hysterically!
I like to laugh. I need to laugh, or the depression and anxiety become too great and I am angry. This last week has been no picnic with the continuing crush from the VA-OIG, add the IRS and several state departments of revenue, and I needed to find humor. Combined with the ongoing dissertation pains and the need for a good chuckle was mandatory! Without further ado, here are things that leave me laughing in the aisles. If repeats are found from previous posts, you have my apologies!
May you choose to enjoy!
© Copyright 2022 – M. Dave Salisbury
The author holds no claims for the art used herein, the pictures were obtained in the public domain, and the intellectual property belongs to those who created the images. Quoted materials remain the property of the original author.
Long before I read Leo J. Muir’s book, “Flashes from the Eternal Semaphore,” I knew I wanted to find joy. But, I was stuck; what is joy and how do I identify joy were my first two obstacles. Yet, from many sources comes the following, in many different forms:
My granddaughter, a toddler at the time, and I took a walk. She found a wildflower in the midst of thousands of other flowers on this walk which was important to her. Upon our walk concluding, we pressed that flower into a book. The time spent with her remains a cherished memory for me, and when I see wildflowers, the memories of this walk and flower pressing come back readily. Truly, joy is found in the ordinary!
I recently encountered a highly emotionally driven individual who claimed to have a problem but could not identify whether they were experiencing a problem or inconvenience. This person wanted but could not identify a need. The heaped emotional hyperbole only added fuel to the fires of hostility. From this encounter, this article is born.
For example, the 
Trace through history, and every time the government has undertaken a path to grow, the industrial complex has more closely tied itself to biggering government as a path to pursue life, liberty, and happiness. However, the growth of government has come at the expense of the electorate through increased laws and legislation, bureaucratic mandate, and larger standing police organizations. All this while simultaneously reducing the quality of education, restricting the power to read, write, and figure, and calling the advances “progress.” Restrictions on competition, merging to form larger military-industrial organizations, and increased costs have shut out citizens from politics, thus capturing the reigns of government to keep feeding the growing beast.
Look at history, especially recent history, and you will find that the most nefarious, liberty stealing regulations, legislation, and bureaucratic mandates have come while America was focused on 9/11, Afghanistan, Iran, ISIS, and the list goes on and on. The hellaciously destructive and misnamed “Patriot Act” was born from 9/11, when had we merely focused on enforcing the laws already on the books, Americans inside America would not have lost all constitutional rights within their own country. The Patriot Act is but one example of the problems created by confusing wants and needs, mistaking a problem for an inconvenience, and using the cudgel of government authority to force behavior changes in the citizenry.
If you believe in the potential of all to pursue life, liberty, and happiness, join me! If you prefer the thumb of government and the boot of oppression, find me when you tire of being abused, cheated, used as cannon fodder for illicit wars, and robbed from, so a select few government employees and elected representatives can live off your sweat and tears. This is the stark reality we are living in right now! We must choose a side and then stand. As Father Mulchay said, “You can’t miss when you have good material.” We, those who stand fast in our liberty, cannot miss, we have good material (the US Constitution), and we can win the day!
After discussing 
I have tried not to let Miss Murphy’s compassion end with me and pass along her lesson often. Compassion and praise remain instrumental tools in every leader’s toolbox. Do not fear using these tools frequently, for then you also will change a life, even if that life is only your own. I am a better person because others have provided me compassion; pass it along!
A colleague of mine mentioned something in passing that has me thinking about the contentious voices surrounding our lives. Consider with me for a moment; when the last time you heard just the news was? No commentary, no hidden bias, no reporting for emotional reaction, simply a description of the events of the day, news? I cannot remember when I last heard a news report. It seems that to get the local news, I have to question the motives on the stories, compare news broadcasts for opinions and biases, tune into three or four different radio stations and compare them to the TV, and those to the newspapers, and even then, 90% of what is reported still has to be discounted.
When emotional intelligence was first coming out, feel free to read the early papers and books on this topic if you doubt what I am reporting. Emotional intelligence was declared as the ability to read the emotions in a room and then control the people through their emotions. For which I have adamantly opposed emotional intelligence as a concept since inception. I have always felt that trying to control others through their emotions is wrong, in poor taste, and can easily backfire when those being controlled wake up and realize what has been happening to them. Yet, emotional intelligence has grown as a concept, has broadened in scope, and no one is asking why anymore. Well, I am, and so are a few others, but the media is working hard to keep us silenced and sidelined as “aluminum hat-wearing non-conformists.”
Well, I would see you escape the hook, wake up mentally, and arise as a powerful individual. Capable of independent thought and able to reason and think using your own instinct, talents, skills, and innate reasoning. I am not making a plea to your emotions, and if you ever think I am playing to your emotions, feel free to call me out! I am not here to enslave your mind, but to free your soul and empower your spirit, to support your goodness, and justify you being the free-thinking person you already are!
On this last point, consider Joe Biden and his words to different audiences on the campaign trail. To one audience, he pledged to put oil company officers in jail for unspecified environmental crimes. To another audience, he promised not to kill coal. Both declarations were later denounced as verbal gaffes, miss spoken words taken out of a larger context, and phrases that did not mean anything on the campaign trail. Yet, the words fit the emotion being witnessed, and the crowd forming the environment and peer group being addressed. All politicians do this, and it is referred to as “politicking” or “playing to the audience’s emotions.”
Those terrorists rioting over the spring and summer of 2020 were pawns and self-destructive actors to the contentious voices. We are all living in a time where social influencers play the most extensive role in the lives of people than ever before, and they can play this role because we have unbridled our emotions and refuse to believe that emotions are a choice, a judgment, and a tool for social integration. While the masses are not taught these things, those controlling the contentious voices know these truths, but they also practice hiding this information to destroy the groups they enslave. Please, free yourself from bondage, take control of your emotions, and never allow anyone to control them ever again!
An email in my inbox started me thinking of Johari Windows first thing this morning, and in the process of proving myself wrong, I learned some interesting things and figured I would share my journey of discovery. I am always fascinated when I prove myself wrong; I like it; mainly because it proves I am still human with a lot to learn!
As a kid, I was told to role model John Wayne, Clint Eastwood, Colonel Sherman Potter, and even Father Mulcahy. I was told to despise those who weaseled on deals, liars, thieves, cheats, lawyers, and politicians. These people were necessary evils, but I never believed in a necessary evil. If you were evil, then you were not worth my time or support. I maintain that position to this day, and it disgusts me to no end when I have been hoodwinked by politicians I thought had integrity who turned out to be wolves in sheep’s clothing. Senator McCain, I am talking about you specifically, and I do not care that you are dead!
I guess it has been a couple of years now, I thought it had only been several weeks, but I had a conversation on the power of religion to improve integrity. I have found just as many atheists as religionists with integrity and just as many religionists as atheists without integrity; thus, I can only conclude that religion is a tool for improving integrity, but individual choice trumps religious flavor and fervor. Yet, religion does play a role in providing a moral background for building a solid foundation under a person with integrity. Seeing as atheism is a religion, I have no problems calling on religionists of the world to unite to provide a moral background to improve integrity where they currently live, work, and reside.
President Biden is utterly bereft of integrity, his children are also utterly bereft of integrity, and Hunter is the worst of the bunch. I do not wish to see how deplorable the grandchildren will be as they will be a millstone around America’s neck for a long time! Vice President Kamala Harris and her spouse are two people utterly bereft of anything approaching integrity, moral uprightness, or even common decency. They are joined by the Obama’s (including the children), the entire Clinton Machine, and the black hole of integrity has many others currently occupying seats in Washington DC for company.
Since we have so many examples of poor integrity, there must be examples of people with integrity. Thankfully the answer is yes, and they are easy to spot. Below are common ways to spot integrity, and I challenge you to look for and vocally support integrity where you find it. One of the best ways to show integrity is to appreciate integrity in others. Catch people doing good and vocally thank them. Send thank you cards. Send thank you emails. Remember them after the incident.
Let me be clear, upfront, and personal; I am not here to tell you what to think, how to think when to think, or where to think. I will not force my opinions and ideas upon you as the global corporate media does. I will offer ideas and suggestions and how you proceed is your affair. Your choices will determine your destiny. I aim to aid you in understanding and viewing the world a little differently to improve your destination.
For example, Speaker Pelosi tore up President Trump’s State of the Union speech record on live, national TV as a knee-jerk response to the sitting US President. Of all the US President’s Speaker Pelosi has experienced, her behavior to President Trump was the most toddler-like, and people quickly excused this behavior as “Trump-Derangement Syndrome (TDS).” Thus, we can drop the “knee” in knee-jerk responses and describe the activity aptly as being a jerk. No thought, not intentional activity (even though the action has intention, the brain does not register cognitive effort), and the reaction to the stimulus is mono-synaptic.
Macro-aggression is the complete opposite and are “obvious, intentional, above-board insults, where there is no chance of a mistake on the part of the transgressor to be provoking, insulting, or otherwise discourteous.” But, again, the definition does not include the fact that the person claiming another person’s activities are macro-aggressive is a personal choice, a judgment, and a socially powered decision.
Micro- and macro-aggression are often claimed to be “triggered” by specific words, colors, foods, waters, fruits, and a host of other items. Essentially using fear and envy to demand people act differently or the consequences are toddler-like fits and fussing, picketing, rioting, looting, e.g., acting like a terrorist. Thus, micro- and macro- aggression is nothing but the toddler throwing a temper tantrum because they are not getting what they want at that moment. While claiming their aggression is on behalf of someone else, and their acts of terrorism are excusable because the aggression was triggered by someone or something else. This is like the eight-year-old older brother or sister throwing a fit that the toddler was punished and claiming they are behaving irrationally in support of the toddler’s tantrum. How many parents will buy this logic; I do not!
Love them or hate them, comedians have changed since I was a kid sneaking peaks of comic relief on cable while washing dishes late into the night. Comedians now carefully pick their materials based upon their perceptions of the audience. Thus, we have classes of comedians, including “Shock Comedians,” who try to be as offensive as possible and still get laughs. We have political comedians; some come down equally on both sides of the political aisle, others are as cemented to a political agenda as they can be and use their “comedy” as a tool to influence their audiences towards that political agenda. We have a host of comedians dedicated to helping people laugh and others who see themselves as able to influence, regardless of consequences.
As a kid, the USSR loomed as an ever-present force that could at anytime wipe America off the map with a pre-emptive nuclear strike. Of course, America would retaliate with nuclear weapons, and this would create MAD or “mutually assured destruction.” People understood MAD was bad, but the communists among us were more insidious about portraying communism. The news media showed bread lines, soap lines, and the bitter pictures of enslavement under communism. Thus, socialism was the way to go, and the communists were selling socialism as the better way to government.
Envy has been one of the seven deadliest sins for a reason; it breeds violence and discontent. Webster shines a light on envy describing it this way, “A feeling of discontent and resentment aroused by and in conjunction with desire for the possessions or qualities of another.” Fear is disgust and envy paired for the weak to overcome the powerful. The disease of envy includes admiration, jealousy, discontent, disbelief, lies, and a host of emotions that overwhelm a person’s mind to the point where they become irrational and hostile. Another resource claims envy (from Latin invidia) is an emotion that occurs when a person lacks another’s superior quality, achievement, or possession and either desire it or wishes that the other lacked it. Aristotle defined envy as pain at the sight of another’s good fortune, stirred by “those who have what we ought to have.”
There is a reason why envy is a deadly sin in both the Old Testament and the New Testament, mentioned in all the ancient books as a problem, and continues to infect people who refuse to learn. Unbridled emotions are captivity, not freedom! There is danger in the extremes of everything. Envy is in the extremes and imitates a minimal issue to capture the mind and control the person. Consider this, capitalism is the best, and envious people implement socialism to chain capitalism while rooting for communism to come in a takeover, thinking they will be better off and the “rich will finally pay their fair share.” Reality is always disappointing for envious people, and the result will be that everyone detests them when their plans come to fruition.
On my desk is a book, “Now Panic and Freak Out,” full of quotations about the lighter side of life. No, I am not revisiting 
Panicking and freaking out are not opposite sides of the emotion coin; they are extensions of staying calm and carrying on. I promise you cannot prove you are staying calm if you have not felt a reason to freak out. You cannot prove you are successfully carrying on if you have not experienced fear and panic. This might at first appear to be a paradox, but telling someone to stay calm who has never experienced panic, they will not know what you are talking about or what to do.
DNC-Consulting 