Choice – DNC-Consulting

Upliftment, Guidance, Hope – The Power of Thoughts

Mumble Often writing about the Department of Veterans Affairs leaves my mind dark and argumentative. My solution is to write something more uplifting, taking a mental break from the drudgery of bureaucrats abusing people. Thus, this article was born from a desire to uplift, guide, and offer hope during a confusing, chaotic, and calamitous time.

In junior high school, I was first exposed to a proverb, saying, blessing, curse, or Chinese expression, “May you always live in interesting times.” I like this saying and consider it a gift. How boring would life be if we lived in uninteresting times? More to the point, consider all the opportunities found when living in interesting times. Opportunities to learn, grow, help, and more, all because we have personally learned to ride the whirlwind of interesting times. With utmost sincerity, I hope you also will always live in interesting times.

Ken Blanchard offers some guidance:

“Asking for others’ guidance helps you see what you may not be able to see. It’s always important to check your ego and ask for help.”

Two things about this quote stand out:

1. 1. Ask – Asking for help, guidance, or support is one of the toughest things a person can do. Unfortunately, point number two is always getting in the way.
  2. Check your EGO! – How often have you asked for help, only to find the support provided clashed with how you thought, and time was wasted not listening, not doing, and not trusting the information provided?

I do not know about you, but I need to check my ego, lock it in a box, and listen more reflectively a couple of thousand times a day. Apologizing to the person rendering guidance after wasting time not believing the advice the first time is even more difficult than not heeding the support the first time and having to ask a second, third, fourth, fifth, etc. time. Instead of exemplifying myself, learn from my scars, listen, check ego, and ask for guidance.

I offer the following as an appendage to guidance:

“Train your mind to see good in everything. Positivity is a choice. The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.”

Our minds require training; this is a universal principle applicable to every mortal. Training happens through the choices we make and the consequences natural to each choice. Emotion is a choice, feelings are a choice, and thoughts can be controlled through training. Can someone make you mad? No! You choose to respond to external stimuli based on how you judge the social situation and your desires. Hence your inner peace and mental well-being are a choice.

In affirming the choices and emotions/feelings, let me succinctly express that what you eat, drink, think, listen to, watch, etc., all plays roles in how you train your mind. Choosing to see the good in other people will never happen if you surround yourself with negativity. Feeling depressed, anxious, or worse, start within yourself. What are you reading, watching, listening to, eating, drinking, etc., that worsens your depression, anxiety, or ability to enjoy good and feel good? In psychology, this is called “Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT),” and the research is fascinating on the application and self-help through taking charge of your inputs to change the outputs and outlooks.

I am not trying to negate the need for professional help in extreme cases, and before making medication changes, please talk to your mental health provider. While there, discuss CBT, and do some research on this topic. The quality of our lives depends on our thoughts, and the quality of thoughts relies entirely upon the inputs into our brains. I struggle with depression, anxiety, and PTSD, but when I am more intentional about what goes into my brain, the less these issues can affect me. Often, I have to take my inputs on a minute-to-minute basis to maintain positivity. You can take charge of your brain and train it to output more positivity.

On my second trip through fourth grade, I was encouraged to learn the following and make a choice:

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

The author was unknown, but the school principal made the challenge after a visit for being a jerk. My principal explained that what I was exemplifying, being a jerk would mean that the world would be a jerk back. So, if I wanted to be treated differently, I had to be what I wanted returned. A tough lesson in fourth grade, even more difficult to remember as time passed, even though I accepted the challenge to change.

What do you want to see in the world? Unfortunately, a colloraly question demands attention: is what you want to see in the world positive or negative? For example, a person I met wanted to see more violence in the world and worked exceedingly hard to create more violence around themselves. Unfortunately, violence has a way of escaping control, and this person received more violence than they started. Call it Karma, Murphy, or something else; the universe seems to have an excellent boomerang device, and what is sent out many times is multiplied and delivered in such a manner as to inspire changing values when returned to you.

Hence, while guidance might be akin to a small tea light, everything might not become apparent immediately, but your next step is clearer than the darkness. Ask for guidance, check ego, and be the change you want through mental training, but first, believe you can do this! Monarch Butterfly

Hope is an interesting power. Hollywood made this clear when a demon on Angel (a TV Show spun-off from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Season 1 Episode 14) made the following comment:

“I had given up… Hope.”

The demon character spoke of the blackest pit, the harshest and most hellacious place they had ever entered. A mind devoid of light, humanity, and hope led the demon to give up hope and begin to fear, contemplating never being able to escape. While fiction, the point is clear, hope is a powerful tool, and with it, our minds can grasp, cling, and strive. Without it, there is a bottomless pit of black despair.

Hope is a relief to grief, music in a tuneless void, light on the darkest path, and a rescue rope flung to others. Yet, to express hope, society claims you’re a “cockeyed optimist,” all while society flails about without hope. Society will always scorn what they do not have; lacking hope, society will always try to negate hope in others while denying it to themselves. Why is training thoughts so essential; to shield your mind from the inputs of negativity. What is the shield you raise; hope!

Good Timber Samuel Johnson, speaking about hope, said:

“Hope is itself a species of happiness, and perhaps, the chief happiness which this world affords.”

Suzanne Collins expressed a similar thought stating:

“Hope is the only thing stronger than fear.”

But, many ask, what do we hope in? What do we hope for? Sure, Pliny the Elder is supposed to have said:

“Hope is the pillar that holds up the world. Hope is the dream of a waking man.”

Religionists will claim that what we hope in, and for, is deliverance from death. Others will claim we need to invest hope in a god, God, or gods. Yet, does this answer the question of what to hope for or where to place our hope? For some, maybe; for others, maybe not. I struggle with hope and would like to offer a couple of potential answers:

Knowledge Check! We begin with a firm understanding of what hope is. Hope is a desire coupled with an expectation the desire will be delivered. For example, in the dark of the night, we hope for sunrise. We expect sunrise to arrive eventually, and when it does arrive, we feel something as we witness a new day dawn — expectation coupled with desire, including a feeling upon delivery.

Some will contend, based on Plato, Socrates, or other philosophers and philosophies, that things hoped for are entirely outside the control of a person. Yes, the sunrise is outside a person’s control, but choosing to feel hope in something is entirely inside a person’s control. Remember the demon, who corrupts people for personal gain, felt hopeless and despaired due to external circumstances. You control the mind; thus, you are always in control of feeling hope – an expectation coupled with desire that includes a feeling upon delivery, often associated with feelings of uncertainty and defiance.

Defiance as an aspect of hope allows the prisoner to spit in the eye of the guards and accepts the consequences, which generally take the form of physical violence. Uncertainty will enable us to turn a light switch on to “see if the electrical power is back.” Expressions of hope come in many forms, but the central figure in expressing and feeling hope is our minds; we control, and thus we cling to hope. Courage

Is hope optimism; no, and hope is also not faith. Distinct differences make hope individual, and we must grasp these differences to understand the power and grandeur of hope. The major difference between hope and optimism is centralized around significance that reflects a claim about ourselves. Pessimists possess hope because something is significant and valuable to them that they can hope for. Faith is a firm belief in things not seen but for which hope is invested and the faithful person will work to bring about. Thus, optimism and faith possess elements of hope but remain distinct and individual. The faith-filled person will find faith challenging to work towards lacking hope, and the optimist will find hope without significance difficult to possess. Hence we can deduce that hope is a type of power, and through hope, faith and optimism receive additional capacity in a person’s life.

Imagine Sisyphus for a moment; each day begins, and the rock he is to roll is at the bottom of a hill. Each day ends, the rock is at the top of the hill. The rock moves up the hill daily through his sweat and labor. Why does Sisyphus move the rock? He hopes to keep the rock on top of the hill. He recognizes that the task is arduous, but he possesses hope, and through hope, he moves the rock. The power of hope is an impetus to motivation, lifting any person to work and, through work’s drudgery, to hope for a future different from today. Repetition and Sisyphus | Thoughts Thinking Thoughts

Hope first lifts thoughts if we choose to allow it, and the person becomes empowered to do something from lifted thoughts. Do we catch the hinge; choice. The human is the one mammal on the earth that possesses the ability to hope, projecting hope into a future changed from the present. The lack of hope is despair, filling the individual with fear, but these are both choices. We choose, and in choosing, natural consequences follow. How we value those consequences determines whether we value or disregard the choice/consequence cycle previously, which leads to new choices and perceptions, producing more consequences and choices.

We invest hope in the future, for a brighter tomorrow, and for improved situations, employment, friends, family, health, etc. Too often, what we hope for is locked in our choices, thoughts, and inputs into our brains in training to make tomorrow different from today. Some people will add religion, and I am not disregarding the power of personally held beliefs that form the basis for religious tenets. Religion helps to lengthen the event horizon, formalize faith and hope, and provides more to hope in and for. Hope is a power fundamental to the human condition, of which all religions, including atheism, agree.

Religionists generally will place hope in something, eternal life, the Savior, a cross, enlightenment, etc., which hope easily leads to faith, and the works needed to obtain the hoped-for desire. How you invest your hope reflects a choice, a passion, centralizes thoughts, and produces an appetite that moves you to action. Recognize the hinge, choices remain central to using hope, and the natural consequences provide opportunities to choose whether that which is hoped in and for to become a reality or to morph into something else more desirable. Truly, we can understand how thoughts become things and the power of thoughts. Rhonda Byrne Quote: "Through this most powerful law, your thoughts become things in your life ...

May this find you well and help provide new ideas for building your future.

© Copyright 2022 – M. Dave Salisbury
The author holds no claims for the art used herein, the pictures were obtained in the public domain, and the intellectual property belongs to those who created the images. Quoted materials remain the property of the original author.

I Have Had ENOUGH! – The Trans/Drag Movement

?u=https3.bp.blogspot.com-fYRTNk48SCwT8ua0IRDWPIAAAAAAAAFZUpexSmJsN2Kos1600overcoming-adversity-help-yourself-believe-cubby-motivational-1289878102.jpg&f=1&nofb=1 Last week, feel free to look it up on YouTube, Officer Tatum was discussing a Drag Queen show where children are present, and the Drag Queen is exposing their underwear regularly to the horror of the children attending. Now, take a minute and put your critical thinking hat on. If a man or woman exposes their drawers to a child anywhere, that person is arrested for exposure and investigated for child endangerment and other potential crimes. Yet, if the person claims to be a cross-dressing member of the LGBTQ+ community, the law somehow doesn’t apply. Tell me why!

Recently, again YouTube has a video, a mother hears about a Drag Queen indecently exposing themselves at her daughter’s school. Indecent exposure, as defined in legal communities, is “the crime of displaying one’s genitalia to one or more people in a public place, usually with the apparent intent to shock the unsuspecting viewer and give the exposer a sexual charge.” It is important to note that in many U.S. jurisdictions, “it is not required that someone observe the act, or see the perpetrator’s private parts, in order for the perpetrator to face criminal charges.” Never forget that those exposing themself in public are at risk of committing more serious sexual crimes and are a danger to society. The mother wears the same outfit to the school board and is considered immodestly dressed for a public forum. News stations blurred the mother’s image to prevent problems with the FCC. Why wasn’t the Drag Queen treated similarly? Why is there a two-tier judicial system in the Republic of the United States of America?

Earlier in 2022, a video is taken of a child slipping cash into the underwear of a Drag Queen. Why haven’t any of these parents been investigated for child endangerment? Children deserve to be raised by parents who are not abusing them by exposing the child to the sexual predilections of a perverted mind. How many more instances of child endangerment are needed before schools, governments, and the judicial system before we as a society take action to stop this chicanery? ?u=http2.bp.blogspot.com-fGEUjJsJ2h4VcJgswaisnIAAAAAAAABcsoFqEewPF_E4s1600quote-if-the-freedom-of-speech-is-taken-away-then-dumb-and-silent-we-may-be-led-like-sheep-to-the-george-washington-193690.jpg&f=1&nofb=1

All are created equally. All are equal under the law. These are not aphorisms or nice thoughts; they are how society works. We must be able to trust the legal system to treat ALL equally under the law. Yet, if you choose to cross-dress, believing you are a soul in the wrong body, somehow you have special treatment under the law and can commit crimes that others would be jailed and rightfully ostracized from society for committing.

Curiosity is no sin, and I have long wondered why we hear stories of men crashing women’s locker rooms but never a woman entering a man’s locker room. A trans boy in Vermont crashes a girl’s locker room, makes snide and disparaging comments, makes the girls feel uncomfortable, and the girls are punished. America has witnessed a star varsity girl be a quarterback on a football team. Yet, she never crashed the boy’s locker room. I have been in school districts where girls have wrestled on the boys’ wrestling team; they never thought to watch the boys change, dress, disparage comments, or make the boys feel uncomfortable. Have you ever wondered why this is always a one-directional story, boys and men against women and girls?

Since SCOTUS ruled in Obergefell v. Hodges, the claim has been made that children would be sacrificed for political correctness. What have we seen happen in America; child molesters are now called “Minor Attracted People,” Drag Queens are paid tax dollars to dance and expose themselves to children in schools, and explicit LGBTQ+ pornography is peddled through school libraries to children who should not be exposed to this garbage. Why? Do not misunderstand; I am thoroughly against heterosexual pornography being peddled to children. We have laws against heterosexual porn marketing and set legal age limits. Why does gay porn not have the same common sense approaches and age restrictions? Lemmings 1

In 2019, I substitute taught at a high school in Albuquerque, NM, for several months. I was horrified at what passed for A.P. English reading materials. Seeing the reading materials that described explicit details of gay sexual activity was sickening. Peddle heterosexual pornography with this explicit amount of detail to minors, and you would be jailed, and rightly so. There are laws restricting this material from minors, but somehow if the materials are gay sexual activity, the rules magically do not apply. Why?

I have seen reading materials pushed by the American Library Association (ALA) that are so obscene I could not finish reading them, and I am not a young mind in K-12. Let me elaborate upon this significance. In Junior High school (1989-1991), I challenged myself to learn about the world. In seventh grade, I was going to read all the books in the Crosby Junior High School library. I was exposed to harlequin romances that were inappropriate for my age, and regret having read them. I read Mein Kampf by Adolf Hitler, the Koran, ideals, and philosophies from all over the world, and I am better for the experience. I wanted an expanded mind; I developed my mind and then felt better about experiencing and experimenting with the world.

NO Fear Generally, I am against banning books, but I am all in for age appropriateness in materials offered for reading. Tell me, should kindergarten-aged children be learning about masturbation? Their young minds and bodies are not developed sufficiently, yet what do we find in kindergarten required reading, how to masturbate? It was inappropriate to have harlequin romances in a junior high school library. What I needed was to learn about love, not sex. Not knowing there was a difference cost me a lot of time and relationships. What is the exposure to gay sexual details doing to the children’s minds right now? Why are these materials not only allowed but promoted to children?

President Thomas Jefferson, when discussing equality in 1776, rightly reminded his countrymen that he never intended to say anything original in the Declaration but only “to place before mankind the common sense of the subject, in terms so plain and firm as to command their assent.” Well, with this missive, my intent is similar; I desire to place before you, dear reader, the common sense of this subject, in plain terms, firmly stated sufficient to command your attention and recognize the evil that has beset this nation.

There is no excuse for the sexual attacks on our children and youth in the name of equality. Equality has become the brick stick to beat populations into submission and chain those minds in captivity. I choose to allow all the freedom to act as they choose, with two provisions:

I am allowed to act as I so choose.
Those who think differently do NOT use the power of governmental force to compel me to give up my liberties encompassed in the first provision.

If you choose to dress as a different sex, gender, or type of person, you are more than free to do so. Make your choices, live your consequences, and leave me alone. However, the LGBTQ+ community is not happy leaving people alone; they insist on stealing rights and liberties through judicial twisting, legislation, and bureaucratic fiat, which is immoral, unethical, and illegal.

Exclamation Mark Where are the rights of parents? On YouTube, a discussion was held that a mother and father had no legal say in what their child was taught in his second-grade classroom. Really, where did the rights of parents go? In 6^th -12^th grade, I freely admit I forged parental signatures on permission forms. Yet, my parents were still afforded their right to say no and tell the school board. More, when my mother became vociferous sufficiently to make a nuisance, she was jailed for contempt regarding teacher overreach in what was being taught to my younger brothers.

The oppression of parental rights is not new, but it has taken a decidedly dangerous turn, and this trend MUST be reversed! The class I hated the most in school sexual education. In the eight different high schools I attended, this class was masked under the guise of reproductivity, family planning, health, and other less obnoxious sounding titles. But always, the class was sexual education, and too often, the course sickened me mentally and physically. Yet, in all eight high schools, the classes were made mandatory, not by parents, but by legislatures who had been hoodwinked by Planned Parenthood and other nefarious political bodies. I learned about women’s periods and cycles in junior high and was physically ill. On my second trip through fourth grade, I saw movies on how children were conceived and more physical nausea.

During those years of government-mandated public education, I learned the words of Jefferson: “Liberty … is unobstructed action according to our will: but rightful liberty is unobstructed action according to our will, within the limits drawn around us by the equal rights of others. I do not add ‘within the limits of the law’; because law is often but the tyrant’s will, and always so when it violates the right of an individual.” The limits drawn by tyrants are violating the rights of individuals, and the noose cinching our growth originates in the twisted minds of those claiming equality for sexual perversion and mental illness.

Tell me, have you researched the psychiatric book on mental illness? Several sections are devoted to the mental illnesses of sexual disorders and the mental health of people who create problems because they refuse to be bound by limits in sexual appetites. The consequences of sexual perversion create mental health disorders. Please, do not blindly believe me; look up the DSM 5. The DSM-5 officially is the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th edition, text revision (DSM-5-TR) released on March 18, 2022, by the American Psychiatric Association (APA). The DSM is a reference handbook that most U.S. mental health professionals use to reach an accurate diagnosis, and the latest version of the manual is the DSM-5-TR. Plato 2

While there are always discussions on the applicability and use of the DSM, this is the reference for lawyers, mental health professionals, and medical doctors in dealing with mental health cases. The information in the DSM-5-TR remains the standard upon which diagnoses and treatment of mental health patients rest. A basic level of reading comprehension leaves the reader with a firm grasp of the obvious, sexual appetites and passions have consequences, and those consequences lead to poor mental health, including depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation, physical, sexual, and mental abuse of others, and a host of social problems and legal issues.

Yet, instead of addressing the problem and suggesting more control of personal appetites, the reverse is preached by media, politicians, doctors, and other key societal groups. Leading us back to Jefferson’s claim that “law is often the tyrant’s will” as a weapon to violate the rights of individuals. Another glimpse into the mind of President Jefferson shows us the following pattern. “Whereas it appeareth that however certain forms of government are better calculated than others to protect individuals in the free exercise of their natural rights and are at the same time themselves better guarded against degeneracy, yet experience hath [shown], that even under the best forms, those entrusted with power have, in time, and by slow operations, perverted it into tyranny . . . [emphasis mine].”

Slow operations are perverting government into tyranny; where have we seen this more apparent than in the bureaucratic nightmare of the federal, state, county, and city/town government on education in publicly funded schools? Under the guise of the twisted and plastic term progress, the ability to read was curtailed by Dewey, and education was bureaucratized slowly into the mess it has become. Math and history are weaponized into topics hated and despised, so the student knows nothing of their country’s rich heritage and history. The popularization of topics has seen the rise of perversion in a bold attempt to groom children for the sexual appetites and passions of adults who deserve public shaming. Instead, those with morals and ethics are denounced and shunned.

Let me be clear and concise, using President Jefferson to help, “Under the law of nature, all men are born free, every one comes into the world with a right to his own person, which includes the liberty of moving and using it at his own will. This is what is called personal liberty, and [personal liberty] is given him by the author of nature because [it is] necessary for his own sustenance.” How you choose is your business, provided it does not infringe upon the rights and liberties of others to pursue life, exercise liberty, and choose happiness. However, what is occurring right now remains in direct violation of personal liberty, and these purveyors of sexual perversion must cease and desist immediately!

You do not have the right to twist the minds of children! You are not the parents, and your job does not give you the authority to interfere in parental rights! The power of government is not an acceptable excuse to steal innocence, groom minds, or pervert those not interested in your lifestyle choices! How you choose to exercise your liberty is between you and the author of that liberty. When you go forth exercising your liberty and try to steal rights and liberties from others, you are the problem. You deserve social castigation, denunciation, and the harshest penalties of the legal system.

Patriotism You have no claims upon my personal liberty, and I want my rights back!

Courtesy: The Key to Civil Society

Not to state the obvious, Roe v. Wade has been rescinded, and the political left has become the antithesis of civil society. Acting in a manner that is rude, boorish, and bloody awful. I know sugar-hyped, caffeine-strung-out, two-years-old who behave better than the supposed adults rioting, looting, and threatening violence. Frankly, after the summer of rage (2020), I am fed up with the media cheerleading criminal behavior in the name of expressing themselves; let us now affirm and cherish as sacred courtesy as the preeminent civil virtue needed in society.

Elder Marvin J. Ashton, of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, The Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter-Day Saints (October 1976), addressed the topic of courtesy while discussing self-management. Quoting Elder Ashton, “Courtesy and self-respect are necessary ingredients” in properly being a member of any society, business, family, etc. In a previous article, the discourteous behavior of the political left was discussed, especially those who choose to join the LGBTQ+ communities. Why has courtesy dropped so precipitously in American society and too other cultures across the globe? Elder Ashton discusses the answer:

“Seeing men and women who think, speak, and act with propriety in any community or personal situation is refreshing and uplifting. Good manners are necessary for the decency and peace of community living. [Good Manners] should be a matter of grave concern to all, yet we hear and read less about their cultivation than we do about dieting and “daily dozens” to enhance our personal acceptance and development.”

Stemming from self-discipline, courtesy is an outward expression of inner strength, and our manners precede us into new situations. As a kid, one of the deadliest sins we could commit was being late to an appointment, meeting, or scheduled event. You could lose your temper, drop the worst language, but if you were late, you were in big trouble! Sure, foul language was a punishment multiplier but was a punishment reducer if you were not late. In the US Army, we were taught if you are not 15-minutes early, you are late. 15-minutes early was on time, building the mental toughness to understand the military requirement of “Hurry up and wait.”

Yet, what do we see too often since 2000, less and less is society expecting a person to be “on time,” let alone early to a scheduled appointment. Worse, recently, I had a doctor’s appointment, and the staff in the office were grateful I had shown up, let alone was 15-minutes early to my appointment. When further discussed, the conversation drifted to how people do not call to cancel, show up hours late, and still expect to be seen, and how the staff was forced to work overtime when people showed up late. The provider felt compelled to see these patients, even though doing so meant staying late. Importantly, sourced from Elder Ashton, serenity and poise are the companions of those who practice courtesy and judgment to always be on time.

As self-discipline has been reduced, social interactions have also declined as people feel attacked when courtesy is absent. Worse, if I do not believe the same as you, social norms state I deserve to be attacked, even physically attacked, and this atrocious behavior is my fault for not having the courtesy to believe the same as you. No! This is not courtesy, self-discipline, or proper self-management, and I refuse to spend another microsecond being abused!

What is courtesy?

Jim Butcher is correct, “If you can’t manage courtesy, try silence.” In defining courtesy, the dictionary refers to courtesy as “polite behavior” and “indulgence.” Yet, I feel this is barely scratching the surface on defining courtesy, especially since indulgence is not a strong suit of mine. Courtesy is a willingness, and ability, to properly relate to others. Courtesy requires humility or a humble approach to social interactions. Elder Ashton was clear, “Proper self-management will permit us to be a team member first, a coach, captain, or superstar second.” Do we understand, and will we willingly accept, the role of a team member, participant, or active and engaged audience?

Early in life, I had some lessons forcibly taught me. Elder Ashton sums up the lessons:

“Good health habits, integrity, bearing, mannerisms, conversation, and self-control can be powerful assets in one’s balance sheet. These traits outwardly reflect the views of the management. Integrity within oneself makes it possible for honesty with God, family, and all other daily associates. A person with integrity within himself will also have it in his relationship with others.”

At my current stage of life, I lack a “cherub-like demeanor” with anyone who tries to steal, infringe upon, or impugn my integrity. This is wrong, and I struggle daily with the slings and arrows of our discourteous society. Yet, still, we find a need to define courtesy, and while healthy eating, exercise, and patience help me in my struggles, these other aspects of courtesy remain invaluable.

Courtesy, as an extension of self-respect and self-discipline, generates improved mental and physical health, further promoting courteous living and mental peace needed to suffer the fools slinging mud and practicing violence. Do we understand the connection being discussed; Elder Ashton affirms, “our self-image and general conduct [observed through] dress, grooming, and hair standards, moderation of voice, use of worthy language, good manners, respect for other’s rights.” However, does this define courtesy; not really, but they form the core of actions witnessed by those with self-respect and self-discipline.

Consider the recent media coverage of the two camps prominent in the Roe v. Wade protests since late February/early March. The dress, language, general conduct, manners, and moderation of voice distinctly identified which camp one woman belonged to or another. The distinction was easily observed long before either camp opened their mouths. More to the point, look at the Republican and Democrat audiences at their respective national conventions. The media coverage never ceases to amaze me, the camera operators and producers work tirelessly to not fuel stereotypes, but even then, the audiences are clearly distinct.

Elder Ashton states and I affirm in the strongest language, “In any community or personal situation, it is refreshing and uplifting to see men and women who think, speak, and act with propriety.” Having traveled amongst incredibly diverse global cultures, it does not matter where you are or the culture you originate from; it is mentally and physically refreshing to be among people who act with propriety and courtesy and live with self-respect and self-discipline. Clearly, courtesy is at its best when it is least obvious, and the least apparent; the greater self-respect shines through the actions and speech of courteous people. Courtesy is a manner of living; it is a lifestyle choice and is not merely a religious thing stemming from a Judeo-Christian moral code (the Ten Commandments). Aristotle is quoted saying, “We are what we repeatedly do; excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.” President Theodore Roosevelt said, “Courtesy is as much a mark of a gentleman as courage.” Consider these two quotes for a moment; courtesy is an action displaying excellence, and courtesy is courage. To Jacques Maritain goes the final word on defining courtesy, “Gratitude is the most exquisite form of courtesy.”

Thus, gratitude, excellence, and gratitude are mere pieces of courteous behavior. Interestingly, I find the best lessons on courteous behavior have arrived from the most disgustingly discourteous people. In the US Army, I was called out by an incredibly courteous person for my language. In the US Navy, I learned why courteous language was required through observing the consequences of the discourteous around me. Several department members used horrific language, acted in manners revealing their lack of self-respect, and then cursed the gods for their predicament with women and money.

I am not saying that courteous living makes people rich or loved. I merely relate that life is better the more I struggle to keep my cherub-like demeanor when stressed by those with manners more closely resembling pigs in rut than men with the potential to become God. William Wordsworth stated in his writing, “Ode: Intimations of Immortality:”

“Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting. The soul that rises with us, our life’s star, hath had elsewhere its setting, and cometh from afar: not in entire forgetfulness, and not in utter nakedness, but trailing clouds of glory do we come from God, who is our home.”

Disregarding religion for a moment, man has a tremendous imagination, but no religion yet has a discourteous god at its center. Let us so live, with courtesy, self-respect, and self-discipline, that when we return to the God who made us, we trail clouds of glory as a mark of gratitude and courtesy.

Honest Questions! Spurring Forthright Discussion.

This is not my first rodeo where family members have chosen alternative lifestyles. One family member was not hostile, quietly adopted a different lifestyle, and lives without bullying anyone. One family member has just come of age, has chosen to live as a different gender, is passive-aggressive, and is hostile to everyone who refuses to participate in their mental disease. The first person is an abnormality in the homosexual community where bullying, bullishness, and boorishness are the standard, not the exception. The second family member has used their unhinged emotional wrecking ball to injure family and friends for the privilege of getting their way. A wholly childish and selfish spectacle deserving of nothing more than abject derision and scorn.

Several friends have embraced different genders and lifestyles, moving from friendly to bully in a relatively short time, and have remained boorish and behaviorally reprehensible ever since. One colleague was at a party, slipped a mickey, and woke up having been raped while drugged. In any other community, this would have been a legal offense; in the homosexual community, this was not even worth mentioning. A sad commentary in and of itself! Unfortunately, this incident has left my friend degraded and feeling worthless, and unfortunately, we have lost touch over the years and miles since this incident.

Many questions remain after having worked around the LGBTQ+ community for more years than I would care to admit. The number one question remaining is the following: If what you are doing is making you happy and more whole as a person, why the anger, resentment, bitterness, bullying, and boorish behaviors? To me, this is a simple question; to my friends and family in the LGBTQ+ community, this is a complicated, complex, and nuanced question, where the person asked becomes more boorish, bullish, and obstinate. So, please answer this question and tell me why this is such a complex and convoluted question.

Dear reader, I now pose the question to you. I do not care how you choose to identify, the gender you prefer, your sexual preferences, or your religious lifestyle. I do not care about race at birth or the race you choose to live. Frankly, all I care about is what you bring to the table regarding talents, skills, abilities, and the attitude you choose. Essentially, I have onboarded Martin Luther King Jr.’s dream; I judge solely by your character. I am not racist, homophobic, sexist, ageist, or any other slur you wish to dream of; respect is often offered to resounding silence or aggressive vocal opposition and hatred, yet respect remains.

Religionists, including traditional and non-traditional, I realize the issues you are facing, and I agree with a lot of your concerns. This does not mean you can be as boorish, bullish, and obstinate in your comments. My agreement with your concerns does not reduce my respect for both parties. Anyone abusing the comment section will have their comments moderated. With that said, any person choosing to abuse the comments section will face the same moderation. I do not tolerate emotionally charged bloviations. Be logical, be respectful, and explain your ideas clearly.

Bear with me for a moment. I speak for myself. I do not speak for all homo sapiens; I do not speak for anyone else but me — I research law, science, history, anthropology, psychology, and much more to form my opinions. Agree or disagree, your choice. Feel free to express your opinion, just understand I might disagree with your opinion, but I love to discuss topics with people. Do not bring emotional hyperbole and try to pass it off as fact! As I have told my wife, I do not care how you feel.

Currently, confusion has set in in global history, and I feel it is time to be truthful and specific. Women have two XX chromosomes, men have an X and a Y chromosome, and this is the entire amount of genders and sexes in mammalian human science. While some abnormalities and diseases will produce various (rare) chromosomal variations outside these two genders and sexes, there are absolutely no more than two sexes and two genders. Recently I was told I was wrong and was informed there are 83 different gender categories, not including those who consider themselves part animal. I continue to disagree pointedly!

One of the misnomers in the gender/transgender discussion is that of human choice, which is more easily understood as agency. The human, as an agent, chooses (exercising agency), and they have the right to choose, but in choosing, their consequences are not anyone else’s problem. We need this point well understood. Sexually transmitted diseases are not society’s problem; pregnancy is still not society’s problem; rape, drug addiction, depression, anxiety, etc., are not society’s problem. How you choose to live your life is your choice; like I have said multiple times in these articles and elsewhere, keep those lifestyle choices in your bedroom and home, and leave the rest of society to live as they choose.

Some of those consequences break a person’s social trust with their chosen society; we call these laws, and breaking laws has additional consequences the agent must bear for exercising agency. Breaking laws is black and white; how society’s agents apply those laws for enforcing those laws (judges, law enforcement officers, lawyers, etc.) is another topic; however, your lifestyle choices do not allow you to break society’s laws with impunity merely because you do not like a law or because that law interferes with your lifestyle. It is against the law to picket, rally, or riot in front of a judge’s home to sway that judge’s opinion! Blocking traffic is not an acceptable or legal method to air your grievances, and there is no such thing as a peaceful protest. You can either legally protest or riot, media talking heads notwithstanding!

Your lifestyle choices do NOT permit you to groom children, become boorish, bullish, or abrasive in public, nor do your lifestyle choices enable you to change laws and social norms to fit your pleasure. Everyone sacrifices to belong to society; not getting your way does not mean you have fewer rights than anyone else. Are we clear on this issue?

Equal treatment under the law means you do not get a pass on sexual predation merely because your lifestyle is different from someone else’s. Morals and values a society selects do not twist, morph, or get simply deleted because your lifestyle choices are out of sync with the rest of society. Frankly, there is nothing new in your lifestyle preferences, so start being a member of society, act responsibly, and cease your incessant whining. Finally, keep your lifestyle choices in your home; you are not allowed to teach children your lifestyle, you are not allowed to take over city streets for parades and displays, and whether you are hetero or homosexual when in public, act respectfully of others.

Let me elaborate on that final statement. I have been married for 25+ years; in public, I choose not to kiss, hold hands, or do any other action that could cause an observer to be discomfited. I make these choices from the moral obligation I owe to our country’s social fabric and the respect I have for my partner. I expect other couples to adhere to a similar standard of public behavior. Nothing is so disgusting than to be forced to watch two immature people abuse the public square by disrespecting themselves and each other through inappropriate actions in public. Are we clear, or do you want more specifications?

Having said all of this, why have you decided now is a good time to multiply sexes and genders? Why now are you demanding “rights” when you already have equal protection under the law? Why all of a sudden is the push on to change society in a warped image of your lifestyle? Please answer these questions, and let’s have a discussion.

It is time for honest and forthright discussions on these topics. Argumentative wrangling is not allowed. Insulting, calling names, and political (emotional) drivel will only end the conversation, for I refuse to put up with sniveling and whining. You seem to have a point; what is your point? You want respect, fine, you have respect; please remember respect is earned and is a two-way street. I will not participate in your mental illness, but I am always willing to discuss real issues honestly, openly, and transparently.

Flashes – The Law of the Harvest

Exclamation Mark Consider a well-known truth that never appears to be fully understood, does a man sow thistles and reap strawberries? Leo J. Muir’s book, “Flashes from the Eternal Semaphore,” lists this as the fifth semaphore, and of the six semaphores, this one is probably my favorite to discuss. Not because I am sowing rocks and reaping corn and beans, but because I often sow rancid vegetables and reap garbage, then wonder why I cannot improve my harvest. As the writings on flash four stated, “Thy speech betrayeth thee,” I am a slow learned and generally only really grasp things after experiencing some consequences that would kill others. As we discuss the Law of the Harvest, please note I am not here to convince or convert, merely to help myself. If you find value in this topic, join me, teach me, that we may both then learn more perfectly.

The law of the harvest is straightforward; many farmers know this law cold, “You reap what you sow.” If you sow lima beans, you do not raise grapes. If you are sowing carrots, you cannot harvest apples. No matter how many times you plant them, Cheerios do not sprout a doughnut tree; I know as I planted a LOT of Cheerios. Bubble gum, when planted, never grows into a bubble gum tree; my mother lied!

Yet, with this mindset, many people, myself included, become depressed, disconnected from reality, and mentally unstable. Thinking, oh, I can sow gossip and truth, and equity and justice will be shown to me. I can tell lies, cheat, steal, then become rich, famous, and never have any negative consequences. I can take and plant some cocaine, heroin, methamphetamines, etc., in my body and remain healthy, strong, active, and never suffer mentally, emotionally, or spiritually. The law of the harvest doesn’t work like this, yet, this remains the greatest living lie. Quotes About Reaping What You Sow. QuotesGram

From the eternal semaphore comes the following:

“Be NOT Deceived! [emphasis mine]”

Now, consider how many people drink alcohol and expect not to suffer a hangover. Consider the people consuming vast amounts of sugar, in all its various forms, who think they will never suffer diabetes, become overweight, or suffer any consequences from all that sugar. My aunt is a great woman, fantastic artist, amazingly kind and generous person, and a chocoholic. She never thought about the consequences of consuming chocolate because the research shows chocolate is healthy; she never could overcome the mental illness she suffered from that the chocolate was a comforting influence. Her family mourns her passing!

The law of the harvest is a stern warning and an incredible promise.

“He that soweth to the flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.”

The pattern is evident for those struggling who sow goodness, kindness, and happiness. Hold on; your harvest WILL come, and it will be glorious. In the same breath, those sowing hate, envy, strife, malice, greed, and so much more, your harvest is also coming, and I feel awful for what your harvest will be. For the law of the harvest comes with a profound sentiment:

“God will not be mocked.” Frederick William Robertson Quote: "You reap what you sow - not something else, but that. An act ...

I promise, there is a God, an atonement IS available through His Son, and the Holy Ghost is real and powerful. The enclosed sentiment in the Law of the Harvest remains my comfort when harvesting the bitter fruits my heart grows. Yes, many times, I quake for the thought that I desperately need to find a way to raise a better crop on the stony ground of my heart. Long have I prayed for a change of heart, for a line from Stephen King’s “Pet Sematary” rings forever in my mind:

“The soil of a man’s heart is stony ground. A man grows what he can, and he tends it. ‘Cause, what you buy is what you own. And what you own… always comes home to you.”

If you get nothing more out of this flash than the need to change fertilizers and seeds, all with an eye to improving your harvest, I have accomplished my goal. Confucius is quoted as saying, “Our headstrong passions shut the doors of our souls against God.” What great counsel, our passions are the seeds, the consequences are the fruit, and the law of the harvest governs whether we will have a harvest to enjoy or curse, and we choose how to value that harvest.

Bear with me a moment; I might have lost a few of you. Let me explain. As a kid, we often had gardens, and I was regularly on the working end of a hoe killing weeds. I cursed those weeds; I despised every second I wielded that hoe in the garden. My cherub-like demeanor was nowhere to be found working those garden rows! Then came the endless days of harvesting, canning, storing, and eating that which could not be stored; I still was NOT a happy person. Ever eat zucchini for weeks on end because that horrible stuff reproduces like rabbits in perpetual heat whose water is full of Viagra? You reap what you sow. #bible #liveBigly #life #affiliate #quote #inspiration #message #world # ...

That is the point; when the harvest comes, and a harvest always comes, we choose how we value that which is being harvested. My father tried hard to teach me this lesson, but all I ever saw were the endless hours sweating in a kitchen preparing jars for canning, the blisters from hoeing the weeds, and the time spent doing that which we would eventually purchase in cans as winter dragged on and on. I could not see any value in gardening, so the blessings of the harvest were lost on me. Headstrong passions blinded my eyes to the blessings of the harvest, and I cursed the day I was conceived. Confucius is correct, and I have witnessed the problems with headstrong passions interfering with the Law of the Harvest many times since.

I am also experiencing the truth from Cicero:

“A youth of sensuality and intemperance delivers over to old age a worn-out body.”

I would add, an intemperate youth also yields a worn-out mind! Having observed this as a youth, I thought I could escape the problems of being intemperate, and I can honestly proclaim, I was wrong! Since my youth, I lifted objects heavier than practical; I gloried in the strength of my body and pushed it to the absolute limit many times. What am I reaping; I was disabled by the time I was 30. I am now older but not wiser. I still want to push my boundaries without regard for consequences and wind up on the floor, in hospital, or mentally unable to think properly for weeks on end. As a kid, when my parents were told of one of their kids being punished (a not infrequent occurrence), they regularly said, “Well, he brought that on himself.” To quote Ray Stevens, “Yeah, I Did!” I did bring on myself the harvest of intemperance and am delivering a worn-out body and mind to old-age. There are lots of seeds we plant and many different types of harvests we reap. When valuing the harvest, choose wisely how you evaluate the crop. #everything #you #do #say #choice #soon #later #quote #lessons #learned #life | Lessons learned ...

Pliny, more famously known as Gaius Plinius Secundus, also known as Pliny, the Elder,” was a Roman author, naturalist, philosopher, and naval and army commander. He is quoted as saying:

“Lust is an enemy to the purse, a foe to the person, [a] canker to the mind, a corrosive to the conscience, a weakness of the wit, a besotter of the senses, and finally a mortal bane to all of the body.”

Lust is regularly only thought of as an intense sexual desire. This type of lust definitely fits what Pliny is warning about; however, lust is also an overwhelming craving, unassailable desire, and intense eagerness or enthusiasm. Yet, many might not fully grasp the semaphore Pliny is flashing; Henry Wordsworth Longfellow might be easier to understand:

“The blossoms of passion, gay and luxuriant flowers, are bright and full of fragrance, but they beguile us and lead us astray, and their odor is deadly.”

Henry Giles and John Howe are both flashing the same message, trying to capture our attention and teach the same lesson:

“The passions are at once tempters and chastisers. As tempters, they come with garlands of flowers on brows of youth; as chastisers, they appear with wreaths of snakes on the forehead of deformity. They are angels of light in their delusions; they are fiends of torment in their afflictions.”

“Sensual delights soon end in loathing, quickly bring a glutting surfeit, and degenerate into torment.”

What do you regret from your youth as the first tastes of passion’s deadly fruits? Let me speak plainer; of course, you remember your first time in love, the rush of passions start, and the heartbreak of closure. Do you see the seeds of passion and the harvested fruits as beneficial or deadly? I know my answers to this question and understand more fully why modesty, chastity, and virtue are to be honored, respected, and cherished. You choose how you evaluate your experiences. You reap what you sow | Everyday quotes, Peace quotes, One word inspiration

I currently work with a person who curses their ex-wife in the vilest language imaginable, yet, they praise their child in the same breath and bless the day they came into their life. What seeds are being planted in the child, the co-workers, and society? Will the bitter fruit be understood and evaluated as good? Time will tell. Byron summed this semaphore perfectly:

“Vice digs her own voluptuous tomb.”

Of all the advice given, I wish I had observed the following more perfectly, and while I do not know the author, many have semaphored the following message in one form or another:

“Shun the obscene!”

A long time back, exactly when escaped me, I watched a comedian who told some off-color stories for the audience’s amusement. Those seeds bore some of the most pernicious weeds in my mind, choking out life and pleasure, goodness, and all things clean and kind. Killing those weeds is a constant exercise, some would classify as futile. But, I have chosen differently and fought those weeds desiring something better, and the fight continues. I do not find swearing, debauchery, lewdness, immorality, perversion, and such amusing anymore. When I came to myself, I cleaned out a LOT of entertainment, removing books, magazines, music, movies, and more in an effort to cling to the good and shun the obscene. I had to re-learn lessons from childhood.

Now I look back on those mistakes, those seeds planted carelessly, and the bitter and thorny weeds I now fight and wish I could help others understand the same lesson I learned. Not shunning the obscene leads to problems immeasurable. In the US Navy, I had a good acquaintance who went to a party, was slipped a mickey, and woke up having been raped by another female. I counseled my friend to report this event and get tested. My friend declined because she “did not know if she liked it or not.” I mourned my friend that day and many days after as she experienced what happened after not shunning the obscene. Before she revealed her true self, her rapist was a person I respected and who was removed from military service for other actions. But the crime of rape went unreported, a sad commentary indeed! John Howe was absolutely correct:

“Sensual delights soon end in loathing, quickly bring a glutting surfeit, and degenerate into torment.”

My friend’s experience in the US Navy always brings a poem to mind courtesy of Alexander Pope:

“Vice is a monster of so frightful mien
as to be hated needs but to be seen;
Yet seen too oft, familiar with her face,
We first endure, then pity, then embrace.”

The truth of the matter remains permanently etched upon our souls or consciousness, “You reap what you sow.” We inherently know this truth, and then become sidetracked by temptation, which comes in the forms of misery, depression, beauty, emotions, and more; wrapped in shiny foil, the fruit inside is always bitter, but the first bite is a temptation that over time becomes that which we would have died to avoid. Robert Southey, the English poet, semaphored this message thusly:

“They who engage in iniquitous designs deceive themselves into thinking that they will go so far and no farther. One fault begets another; one crime makes another necessary. Thus downward they go into the depths of guilt, which at the commencement of their career they would have died rather than incurred.”

Question Can you relate to your experiences with planting and harvesting? What are you teaching and semaphoring? Dr. Johnson adds a comment worth remembering: “The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken.” While Dr. Johnson is correct, there is a “Balm in Gilead,” there are chain cutters available through repentance and a path back. There is a reason to hope! Not speaking religiously, nor am I here to convert anyone to any religious flavor, merely to alert those needing it that there is a way to clean your mind and heart, that your future may produce a better harvest. Even if you might have to harvest garbage for a while as the ground cleans itself of the impurities dumped into it. Mr. Muir quotes Simons, a reference unknown, regarding the path:

“Impure thoughts awaken impure feelings, lead to impure expressions, and beget impure actions, and these lead to imbecility both of body and of mind, and to the ruin of all that is noble and pure in character.”

We who have survived youthful transgressions understand this path perfectly. Note, we live in an age of severe iconoclasm, where every day, we are bombarded by attacks on established beliefs by institutions built for the sole purpose of tearing down others. Who cannot replace their depravity and destruction with anything wholesome, good, pure, or worthwhile. Where beliefs of religion, societal norms, and institutions representing the living and breathing were destroyed for the wanton pleasure of the iconoclasts. The age of the iconoclasts began with the 1960s, and nothing built since is worth the pain and suffering we are experiencing now. Worse, those iconoclasts from the 1960s are now teachers and professors, elected leaders, and their legacy of destruction stares them in the face while they laugh and take pleasure at your suffering. Quotes About Reaping What You Sow. QuotesGram

With each successive generation of iconoclastic behavior, the succeeding generations are a factor of 10 worse than their parents. Think of how many generations have come and multiplied this abhorrent behavior into society. Is it any wonder as a society we are in the mess we are in, where criminals get off, the victims are repeatedly punished, good is heralded as evil and evil for good. But, I promise there is a “Balm in Gilead,” there is a path forward that leads back to life, growth, happiness, goodness, and a morally upright society. Shunning the obscene is the first step!

Knowledge Check! We must be the generation that begins the repair job from the iconoclast’s destruction. The ravages inflicted upon us will require re-learning, embracing hope, building faith, and acting charitably through faith and hope to act charitably first to ourselves, then to our families and friends, and then to the broader societies we all live in. Whether you embrace a religious community or not, the imperative to “Shun the obscene:” the need to sow better crops to reap a more desirable harvest valued by others is universal. Not to create fervor and fanaticism, but to create a people dedicated to improving ourselves and after improving ourselves to improve the world around us.

May we all enjoy a better harvest is my hope!

Flashes – How is your quest for JOY coming?

Bobblehead Doll Long before I read Leo J. Muir’s book, “Flashes from the Eternal Semaphore,” I knew I wanted to find joy. But, I was stuck; what is joy and how do I identify joy were my first two obstacles. Yet, from many sources comes the following, in many different forms:

“Man is that he might find joy.”

What is Joy?

An appeal to the dictionary confuses joy and happiness, forming part of the problem where understanding joy is concerned. The closest definition for joy coming from the dictionary is to define joy as an ecstatic feeling, pleasure, or deep satisfaction. But, if a person goes around chasing a euphoric feeling, they will be disappointed in pursuing joy. If we consider joy as not an emotion but the result of an unexpected event that creates feelings of peace and contentment, then joy is more fully understood, but the quest for joy becomes more challenging to pursue. How does one pursue an unexpected gift?

Christians, and some Jews, share a description of joy as a “good feeling in the soul, produced by a visit from the Holy Ghost (Spirit); thus, joy is felt as a consequence of a visit from another being. However, unless you pursue education into those religions, you still might not fully grasp what joy is and why we seek joy so ardently. One of the most straightforward descriptions for joy comes from the writings of Pope, an English author from the 16^th century who wrote:

“Reason’s whole pleasure, all the joys of sense, lie in the three words –health, peace, and competence.”

Hence the pursuit of joy is gaining health, peace, and competence. So we can conclude that joy is found in possessing health, peace, and competence, as a consequence or good feeling stemming from achieving these three items. Now, I know someone will get bent out of shape here; what if I have poor health, how can I pursue joy? The answer lies in understanding peace and competence as co-equal parts of health.

Recently on YouTube, I watched an amputee discuss their amputation, health, peace, and display their competence. One could argue that losing a foot is poor health, yet this person glows with good health for having joined health to peace and competence. By the same token, I know several people who possess poor health, are depressed from not finding peace, and are not competent. While working with mental health patients, I met a person in a wheelchair who cannot walk, can barely speak, and this person chooses to live on the street in misery. This person has plenty of money for an apartment but chooses to live on the street eating from garbage cans in abject misery. Thus, we can see the need for combining health, peace, and competence to obtain joy. One might even define joy as a consequence of choices that build a life. However, and this is critical, the feelings of joy are internal!

Imperative to understanding joy as a consequence is the need to grasp that joy is an internal feeling of ecstasy, delight, and wonder while dependent upon health, peace, and competence. We cannot understate this importance nor overstate the criticality of joy to the combination of health, peace, and competence. I have met very depressed people who possess competence but cannot find joy. I have met people with great health and who are miserable. Possessing one or two of these components does not disqualify you from obtaining joy or pursuing joy, but lacking all three will not produce joy in any quantity or with any staying power. Joy is not an event in life but a collection of events from life, where “everything just clicked.” 50+ Joy Quotes - a Perspective on Life | iCreateDaily | Quotes

Finally, it must be expressly noted joy is not an emotion; thus, joy cannot be chosen from a list of emotions to fit circumstances. Since joy is not an emotion, this is where happy and joy are most often confused. If an external event occurs, and health, peace, and competence are not present, happiness, not joy, is being felt or experienced. If health, peace, and competence are present, and the feeling of joy swells inside, independent of all other factors, then joy is being experienced.

Case in point, in the US Navy, I served in a toxic working environment as a highly competent sailor. I possessed health and, through inner strength, enjoyed peace inside myself. Frequently, I would experience joy, even though external elements and environments appeared expressly designed to “make me miserable.” By choosing to disallow an external event to choose my emotions, peace was mine, and joy was a consequence. Joy Quotes 3 | QuoteReel

Another English author from the 16^th century was Edward Young, who concluded the following:

“On the soft bed of luxury, most kingdoms have expired.”

What is happiness?

The definition of happiness is as convoluted as the definition of joy. Consider the following: “Any state of being, having considerable permanence, in which pleasure predominates over pain.” Yeah, that’s going to help a person understand! Sarcasm aside, the definitions of happiness also include some interesting aspects for consideration: fortuitous aptness or fitness, grace, beauty, and felicitousness. Happiness is also the quality or state of being happy, as if that actually helps.

Happy, the root word of happiness, is defined as cheerful, willing, possessing good luck or fortunate, a marked pleasure satisfaction, or showing the same. What the dictionary skips, and the elements needed for understanding happy and happiness, is that being happy relies upon external factors and is a choice. We choose to emote happy or happiness based upon external forces, societies, people, events, and environments. Spread Happiness Quotes. QuotesGram

Steven Aitchison is quoted as saying, “Happiness begins with the decision to no longer feel sad.” Is it clear that happiness, like all emotions, is a choice? The importance of choosing our emotions cannot be understated, and many of life’s biggest problems would disappear if we chose better emotional responses to external stimuli. Aristotle provides the final word on happiness:

“True happiness comes from gaining insight and growing into your best possible self. Otherwise, all you’re having is immediate gratification pleasure, which is fleeting and doesn’t grow you as a person.”

What is the difference between Joy and Happiness?

Of a truth for certain, confusing Joy and Happiness leads to despair, misery, and failure. Please keep the following clearly in mind; happiness is external. Happiness is based on situations, events, people, places, things, and thoughts. Happiness is connected to your hope. Believe it or not, the following observation is not religious thinking, faith builds hope, hope builds charity, and charity is nothing but an outward action of an inner commitment (faith). Happiness is faith and hope expressed for everyone to see. Put the words in any order and use a thesaurus. The result never varies; happiness is a consequence (resulting from) of faith and hope combined into action, and others might call that action charity. Quotes about happiness

If further questions arise about distinguishing between joy and happiness, please review the above definitions where I have attempted to clarify the delineation. One essential factor in pursuing peace is time to reflect, which promotes peace and distills into competence. Competence breeds from education (formal and informal) applied over time and understood through reflection. Peace is stability, mental calm and derives from reflection and additional education (formal and informal). Health can be physical, mental, and spiritual, but of these three, mental and spiritual are more important than physical health. Again, when combined, independent of all external forces and environments, joy is the consequence, not happiness!

Please allow me to point out something truly obvious when a person wishes you joy, they generally also include happiness as an addition to their blessing. For example, the Whitney Houston song whose lyrics claim:

“I wish to you joy and happiness. But above all this, I wish you love.”

Thus confirming that joy and happiness are two distinct and separate entities. The US Constitution allows and encourages a person to pursue “Life, liberty, and happiness” as inalienable rights.” Joy is not included! Benjamin Franklin is quoted as saying:

“The US Constitution doesn’t guarantee happiness, only the pursuit of it. You have to catch up with it yourself.”

The Quest for Joy

The quest for joy begins with education (formal and informal) as a building block for competence and to begin the process of finding peace. While influenced by external factors (drugs, alcohol, disease, viruses, bacteria, etc.), health requires mental and spiritual inputs and is not content without peace. Choosing to accept physical limitations is part of building mental and spiritual peace, and the human body cannot long survive without mental and spiritual health and peace, but the body can long endure physical health problems if mental and spiritual health remains. Meme Quotes » Happiness

Another truth becomes evident when questing for joy, “Joy dwells in the ordinary.” Consider this for a moment; a person gives another person a flower. Ordinary, simplistic, and yet this giving provides joy to the giver and receiver. How swift and fleeting is the happiness of Christmas, where the gifts are generally more extravagant, costly, and luxurious, but a simple flower can spark a world of memories.

Why bees & biodiversity benefit from indigenous wildflowers My granddaughter, a toddler at the time, and I took a walk. She found a wildflower in the midst of thousands of other flowers on this walk which was important to her. Upon our walk concluding, we pressed that flower into a book. The time spent with her remains a cherished memory for me, and when I see wildflowers, the memories of this walk and flower pressing come back readily. Truly, joy is found in the ordinary!

Elbert Hubbard reminds us that:

“Ozone and friendship will be our stimulants – let the drugs, tobacco, and strong drink go forever. Natural joy brings no headaches and no heartaches.”

Why; because natural joy combines health, peace, and competence into a powerful force. No further stimulation is needed or wanted. Bulwer Lytton provides the best flashing sign for contemplation:

“We lose the peace of years when we hunt after the rapture of the moments.”

What will you sacrifice in the quest for joy, the peace of years, or the rapture of moments? One of the most miserable people I have ever met chased rapture in the moments and could not understand why chasing momentous euphoria did not lead to anything other than the chase for more rapturous moments. Like any drug, the mind and body build a resistance to the drug over time, and more and more of the drug is required to obtain a similar experience. Be the drug sugar, chocolate, heroin, cocaine, tobacco, alcohol, etc., the pattern is the same, and the consequences are the same. Depression, anxiety, addiction, destruction, call the consequences what you will, chasing the rapture of moments is death.

We conclude with the following from Robert Louis Stevenson, may his words ring out on our journey for joy as a beacon and a sounding board to base decisions upon:

“He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often and loved much; who has gained the respect of intelligent men and the love of little children; who has filled his niche and accomplished his task; who has left the world better than he found it, whether by an improved poppy, a perfect poem, or a rescued soul; who has never lacked appreciation of earth’s beauties, nor failed to express it; who has always looked for the best in others and given the best he has; whose life is an inspiration; whose memory, a benediction.”

May your quest for joy be fruitful!

Christmas and Other Holidays – A Frank and Open Discussion

I am unapologetically a Christian, I regularly attend church, and I exercise faith through daily scripture reading, prayer, and other works synonymous with being a Christian. Being a Christian, I embrace freedom, especially freedom of religion; “Let [all people] worship how, where, or what they may.” I am not smart enough to tell anyone, convince anyone, or try to force anyone to believe anything. As a point of fact, my articles very specifically encourage you to find your answers, much as I have done, through study, learning, and faith.

Yes, this is a discussion! I do not understand Christmas in any way, shape, or form; while this also applies to all accepted holidays, Christmas is my focus. If you understand Christmas better or any holiday mentioned, feel free to teach me so that we both may learn more perfectly. Christmas, as a child, was only once a time of wonder. I remember that Christmas; I must have been 6 or 7 years. I do not remember what I got for Christmas, but I remember how I felt. I have not felt similarly since, and while I know why, I do not understand how to put the wonder back into Christmas.

Annually, Christmas, New Year, and the rest of the mid-winter holidays are a time for deep depression. I struggle to feel anything from Halloween to mid-February; think London Fog as a mental condition, and your close to understanding what is happening between my ears annually. As a child and teen, the holidays were always a time of stress, increased drama, and tons, and tons, of dishes. The holiday season brought increased torment as parents’ stress (especially) resulted in increased violence (physical and mental). Thus, I learned not to appreciate the holidays but loath the workload, violence, and abuse and view the holiday season as a time of greater pain and suffering.

Don’t even get me started on how to celebrate Mother’s and Father’s Day. There are holidays, and choosing to celebrate or not is just as important as how to celebrate and whom to celebrate. The biggest mistake society makes is trying to force everyone to celebrate the same holiday!

As an adult, mainly due to the depression, I avoid stores between Halloween and mid-February, like the plague! The music of “Christmas” does not lift, and I find it difficult to hear. To me, the people during Christmas are more challenging to be around. I do not understand their choices and changes in attitude, their happiness, nor share in their wonder and excitement. The pagan beliefs Catholicized into Christmas traditions blow my ever-loving mind! I do not see Christ in a decorated “Christmas” Tree or other Christmas pageantry. Simply put, every Christmas Tradition, generally accepted by Christendom, is stolen from mid-winter pagan holidays. As I have studied the origins and beliefs inherent in Christmas, Easter, Halloween, All Saints Day, etc., I see more and more of the historical imprint of early Catholic Church leaders, and I stand aghast that these beliefs have turned into traditions that bind and hold fast the human mind.

Yet, to not wish someone else, especially another Christian, “Merry Christmas” is to be judged less a Christian. I do not understand! I believe in Christ; I believe in and have a knowledge of his reality, birth, life, death, resurrection, and visitation to all the Twelve Tribes of Israel after his resurrection. I accept Christ as my Savior and advocate before the Father. But, I do not understand Christmas celebrations or why these celebrations “speak of Christ, rejoice in Christ,” or promote Christian beliefs! I understand the underpinnings of, and like the Jewish holiday Hanukkah. I see Christ in this celebration of lights and appreciate those who celebrate this simple holiday simply. But Hanukkah is not a holiday I can fully enjoy either, not for the lack of trying.

I have the same problem with Passover, not for the lack of trying, but I cannot celebrate this holiday, for I feel something is missing. Easter, will someone please explain to me the lines of logical congruence between a bunny rabbit laying eggs and the resurrection of Jesus Christ! None of the “traditions” of Easter make a lick of sense to me. While I feel different at Easter than I do with any other holiday, I do not celebrate this holiday either, even though I respect and honor, follow and try to emulate Jesus Christ as my personal Savior, advocate, and hopefully friend. While we’re on the topic of incongruent traditions, Santa Claus creeps me out! The fear of being judged without an advocate or appeals process is anti-Christian, but Santa Claus continues to play a fearful role in Christmas. Worse, the mysticism prevalent in a belief in Santa Claus fills my mind, not with Christ’s giving of himself, but of Halloween! Tim Burton’s movie, “Nightmare Before Christmas,” is closer to how I see Santa Claus, put him in Halloween, and leave him there!

Yet, here we are, another Christmas celebration is upon the world, and I do not understand! I like the lights of Christmas and enjoy them year-round, but they are not symbols of Christ lighting the world; they are just lights to me, with no particular holiday attachment. I am a foodie, but food is just that, food. No special holiday attachment; worse, as a diabetic, I have to watch how, when, where, and what I eat. There is no fun in that, no holiday significance, and frankly, no joy in Mudville.

A friend declared, Christmas is about love. What is love? I know from significant study what love is not. Love is not sex! Love is not punishment, abuse, torment, and throwing all the dishes out of the cupboard and forcing a young child to wash every dish in the house repeatedly until that dish somehow passes an arbitrary level of cleanliness, with frequent beatings for failure to meet that level of cleanliness! Love is not inflicting pain, causing tears, and being violent. It has been easy to identify what love is not. But defining what love is, what it feels like, and how to share love, I have no clue!

Often, I am referred to as a “Cold-Hearted, mean, bastard,” many times, other adjectives are thrown in to describe me. I wear a “bar-sinister” proudly; I am a bastard! I fight this nature of myself every single day; sometimes I win, more often I lose. Sometimes I have thought, maybe this aspect of my character is why I cannot fathom the meaning of holidays, find wonder, or experience joy as readily as others. Sometimes I think the method of how I was raised is inherent in being that bastard I despise. Yet, I am a survivor because of the ways and manners of my childhood upbringing, and I have gratitude for being a survivor. Meaning somewhere in there is gratitude for how I was raised and being a bastard. I fully appreciate how paradoxical that thinking is. Remember, a paradox is where two points that appear contradictory at first glance but in deeper understanding are closer than they are apart.

What does being a bastard have to do with Christmas and celebrating the birth and life of Jesus Christ; thankfully, I can answer that question. Only in and through Jesus Christ can my nature change. That single hope is precious to me, remains an impetus in motivating me to change, and powers my striving. Without the birth of Christ, there could not be a death and resurrection. Without the birth, life, death, and resurrection of Christ, man could not change his nature, understand and possess freedom, or comprehend the higher laws of giving of self, choosing a different method of living, and rising above the natural man and comprehending why man has to rise above his natural beliefs into a higher understanding.

Yes, I celebrate Jesus Christ! Make no mistake; I am grateful for my Savior; but, I do not understand Christmas! I cannot fathom a celebration of Easter as currently celebrated and understood in Christendom. I long for further light and knowledge to more appropriately commemorate the birth, life, reality, resurrection, and example that is Jesus Christ! I know that only through the merits, mercy, and justice of Christ can I eventually gain the further light and knowledge I seek. Please don’t think I do not celebrate when I wish you the happiest of holidays; it is an honest expression of a heartfelt desire for you to celebrate and worship how, where, when, and what you may. Please understand, though, I am not participating, not because I do not believe, but because I do not understand.

A well-intentioned person told me to “Fake it until you make it.” I have tried following this advice, and while it worked in other aspects of life, I learned more, and faking it stopped working. Where holidays are concerned, I cannot “Fake it, hoping to somehow, make it.” Faking it requires a method of belief with a hope. I have hope and knowledge; thus, I do not have a belief, or reason to believe. In possessing knowledge, my belief can take wing with confidence, and in that understanding, I can no longer “fake it.” As a respecter of religious belief, and as a seeker of light and knowledge, there have been times I have thought how easy it could be to be an atheist; but, in possessing knowledge, I understand I cannot live without the belief and knowledge of a Savior, a Heavenly Father who had the sense to hand man laws, cover his mind with a veil of his past life, and tell man to live by faith. The atheist cannot understand the value in living by faith, for they choose not to believe, even when presented with evidence.

C. S. Lewis is one of my favorite authors, speakers, and characters from history. He understood the chasm between choice and the consequences of choosing not to believe and live according to beliefs. Mark Twain is another character, author, and speaker who I deeply admire and appreciate, for many of the same qualities exhibited by C. S. Lewis, are found in Mark Twain. Thus, we find both an exemplar of the principles discussed and another issue with the holidays. Knowing what I know regarding the origins of the holidays, the traditions adopted and Christianized, and the chains which bind from traditions, I struggle with celebrating holidays.

As a child, I asked why do we decorate a Christmas Tree? After removing all the religiosity, the answer was because their parents did it that way. Why did we feast; remove the religiosity, and we find it’s because everyone else celebrates holidays (peer pressure and traditions) with feasting. In the movie and play “Fiddler on the Roof,” the primary character sings, discusses, and lives under the iron fist of tyrannical tradition, and I am left with one question, “Why?” Why do something just because it is tradition? Jesus Christ brought freedom of conscience; believe how, when, where, and what you may, act and live according to your beliefs, and you are exercising freedom and liberty. Where does tradition fit into belief and living according to choice, freedom, and agency?

Bringing the conversation back to principles of freedom, choice and showcasing how decisions determine destiny. Again, I am not casting aspersions, nor trying to convince anyone to do something they are not comfortable with, nor am I denigrating or deriding anyone’s beliefs, traditions, or methods of worship or celebration. My intent is not to cause a crisis of faith but to understand for myself. Please, embrace your freedom to choose to worship, and celebrate, how, where, when, and what you may. In possessing this freedom, allow others to worship and celebrate how, when, where, and what they may. Enjoy your holiday traditions and celebrations. But, please do not judge me as less because I do not understand, believe differently, and live according to my beliefs.

Santa Claus coming to town fills me with dread and despair, not hope, wonder, or joy. A white Christmas is not a dream for me but a symbol of more snow to shovel, even though I LOVE watching the snow fall and playing in the snow. Christmas trees do not thrill me but represent a ton of work to put up, more work to maintain, and more work to take down. Food is not a celebration but represents more work, time, effort, and sacrifice, for momentary pleasure. While I enjoy food, eat food, and talk about recipes to make food, I do not worship at the altar of food or see any connection between food and traditional celebrations.

I totally get it; the Children of Israel fled Egypt the Passover is a sacred remembrance and should be celebrated; but, Christ showed a better way, and through that better way, the bitterness of fleeing is swallowed up in joy. Why eat bitter herbs and unleavened bread as part of the tradition and celebration? Joy is knowledge with aspects of painful experience encapsulated in achievement. Thus, to me, the flight of Israel shows how faith, painful experience, and achievement are possible, and I want to shout and sing for joy. I have always thought of Passover as a time for glorious celebration. Strike up a band, sing, shout, and make merry, for we survived the Passover, escaped Egyptian slavery and harsh bondage, and now are free! The same goes for Hanukkah, the resurrection of Christ, the birth of Christ, and every other holiday. The holiday, to my understanding, represents, or signifies, a reason to make merry because those who came before achieved something through enormous difficulty, suffered dreadful pains, and achieved a better place. They have joy, and we share in that joy.

Bringing up the final aspect of the holidays, sharing joy. How do we share in the joy those who suffered experienced? This is the crux of holiday celebrations. How we answer this question determines the traditions we embrace; the decisions and consequences produce a destiny. Consequences are neither good nor bad, simply natural actions formed from a choice an agent made. How we choose to place a value on those consequences immediately determines how often we will make the same choice again, leading to determined destiny over time and repetition. Using this understanding of choices and consequences, we revisit the question, “How do we choose to share joy?”

I do not know how to answer this question! Worse, I feel this single question forms the crux of all holiday celebrations, and I am flummoxed! Some have suggested I perform more service to share joy. Others suggest giving gifts. Others have offered well-meaning opinions, ideas, and suggestions that I cannot fathom as connected to a holiday—leading to a need to understand why. Why act differently leading up to a holiday when you act in an opposing manner the rest of the year? Why not act the same year-round?

Again, there is no judging, no aspersions cast, no denigration of actions and choices here. I am not your judge! But, these questions are the questions I struggle with living, understanding, and connecting to holiday celebrations. If you have answers, please share them with me, help me understand how you share joy, celebrate, and feel.

© Copyright 2021 – M. Dave Salisbury
The author holds no claims for the art used herein, the pictures were obtained in the public domain, and the intellectual property belongs to those who created the images. Quoted materials remain the property of the original author.

What Draws People Together? – A Discussion

Father Mulcahy With gratitude to C. S. Lewis, today’s article is not meant to be my pontificating on a particular topic, but a discussion where we work to find commonality and increase knowledge. I cannot stress this enough; I am not the end-all resource on a topic, especially topics I remain utterly ignorant about. Love, friendship, charity, and many more are topics I am learning about and if you are a subject matter expert, feel free to join the conversation, add comments below, and let’s learn together.

As we begin, I will stress one more point; it is a pattern I have learned well. “We teach that we may learn more perfectly.” Thus, while I remain thoroughly ignorant, I will teach what I know, what I have found, and what I suspect so that I may learn more perfectly what I desire. Welcome!

“Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person’s ultimate good as far as it can be obtained.” ― C.S. Lewis

As a kid, love was getting beat, having chores heaped up, and being punished as my mother was God’s right-hand person. Her favorite saying was, “That was God punishing you for what you did.” I have had a complicated relationship with God ever since I could remember. Worse, this relationship has been clouded with a misunderstanding about love, chastisement, and punishment. The quote above from C. S. Lewis is one I have been thinking about and continue to try and understand its application.

“What draws people to be friends is that they see the same truth. They share it.” ― C.S. Lewis

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.’” ― C.S. Lewis

These two messages on friendship are, to me, very important. But, I have found that the importance varies based upon whether people form around a personality trait or a truth. For example, I choose to be a bibliophile. Books are fundamental to my personality, identity, and methods of looking at the world. But not all books are worthy of being in my library or possessing the same value. When I find people who have read the same book, found similar truths, these people become value-added relationships, and together we move forward. As a foodie, as a baker, as a distinguished eater of good foods, I have met many people. But very few of them joined my society for very long, as their association is built upon food, not truth. Are the distinguishing characteristics understood?

“You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub and exploit – immortal horrors or everlasting splendors.” ― C.S. Lewis

Consider this unique perspective and inherent truth; we are immortal spirits having a mortal experience. But, inherent in this truth from C. S. Lewis is the individual’s choice to be either an immortal horror or everlasting splendor. To some people, I am an immortal horror because of my actions in their society, and to these people, I offer a sincere apology. These people know who they are, know how they were hurt, and if I could, I wish, I could go back in time and change my actions. I wish the opposite were true, that there were people who would consider me an eternal splendor, for that is what I have been working to achieve in human relations for a long time now. Still, I remain an immortal personality, spirit, and individual.

“Everyone thinks forgiveness is a lovely idea until he has something to forgive.” ― C.S. Lewis

Or something to be forgiven for… do you think C. S. Lewis intentionally left this part out in this statement? What is more difficult, forgiving someone else, forgiving ourselves, or being forgiven? I do not have this answer, but I find the question intriguing. I am not venturing into religion, religiosity, or preaching religious dogma in asking this question. I am merely asking for consideration of a tool. Forgiveness is a useful tool, for, through forgiveness, we begin the process of forgetting, healing from physical, spiritual, and mental/emotional wounds. Wounds that cannot find closure and healing any other way. But one of the things I learned about injuries is focusing on them, poking them, ripping scabs off, all these things, and more are reopening those wounds, where forgiveness is like a really good bandage that holds both a pain reliever and a healing cream to speed healing. Yet, how often do we refuse this tool, or worse, use this tool for a limited amount, not allowing the entire wound to heal?

“..Friendship is not a reward for our discriminating and good taste in finding one another out. It is the instrument by which God reveals to each of us the beauties of others.” ― C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

I have met some ugly people whose physical features are terrible, but they are beautiful and lovely immortal beings. On the opposite, I have unfortunately met some physically beautiful people who are ravening wolves and immortal horrors, where I curse the day we ever crossed paths. What never ceases to amaze me is that physical beauty and internal splendor or horror are not mutually exclusive or inclusive. The physical is generally the results of choices others have made and reflect the injuries overcome, whereas the internal is all individual choices, compounded over time, into horror or splendor. One of the truths I have found is patience is generally the perfect revelator of another person’s horror or splendor, and rushing the judgment always leads to a need for forgiveness.

“We live, in fact, in a world starved for solitude, silence, and private: and therefore starved for meditation and true friendship.” ― C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory

Do we understand this pattern, as laid out by C. S. Lewis? How often has a good friend promoted solitude, silence, and private thoughts and contemplations within ourselves that have led to meditation and deeper friendships? I married my best friend. Sometimes we fight like brothers, more often though her input has caused this pattern to be unfolded to me in new and interesting ways. Sometimes we disagree on topics and get quite vocal in our discussions. Sometimes we disagree quietly and wait for the other to come around when in reality, we are generally waiting for ourselves to realize and learn. For the better part of almost three decades, we have lived after the manner of learners, and this friendship has only deepened. Even though sometimes frustrations run high, the friendship has value for inspiring this pattern to be effective.

“Pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our consciences, but shouts in our pains. It is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” ― C.S. Lewis

“Hardship often prepares an ordinary person for an extraordinary destiny.” ― C.S. Lewis

Does hardship ever come without pain? I remember my first week or so in US Army Basic Training; the pain in my muscles was incredible, and the torture of physical exercise I thought was going to kill me. Yet, I put on weight (muscle) because of basic training, I learned endurance, and the results have been nothing but beneficial. Thus, I could say, basic training was a megaphone of pain to rouse a deaf person to action, and the resulting life changes have been extraordinary. Do we kick and curse the pain, or do we hold deep to the hope that the pain will lead to something extraordinary? The choice is important, the pain is temporary (always), and the resulting consequences determine our destiny.

“The homemaker has the ultimate career. All other careers exist for one purpose only – and that is to support the ultimate career. ” ― C.S. Lewis

Never Give Up! We conclude with this thought and provide honor to those who are the homemakers! One of the first things I learned as a military dependent is that the military spouses, the homemakers who watch hearth and tend the wounds, are incredible people. As a military servicemember, I learned a new appreciation for my homemaker and the friends and family who supported her in the ultimate career. As a veteran, my appreciation for the role of the ultimate career professional has only deepened and widened. As we go into Thanksgiving celebrations, remember the homemakers, male and female, who, through tending hearth and home, make the job of supporting the homemaker easier and more bearable.

Rules for Achieving Production Goals

Knowledge Check! Some may scoff, others may scowl, but I will tell you an open secret, if you are not quality first, production goals will never be achieved. Sure, a company may hit a target now and then, of course a quarterly statement might come in on target, but reliable production cannot be achieved without quality focus and the following rules.

With more than 20 years’ experience in manufacturing, supply chains, logistics, call centers, and much more, the following production rules are at least a moment of your time for reading and two moments for consideration. Yes, there are a lot of people who will claim they have the path to success mapped and if you follow it, you to can achieve success. I am not one of them! I have tried and true lessons, I have common sense approaches, and I offer freely information that when combined with your knowledge, and the people you have working for you, solutions can be generated to achieve success.

Quality is everyone’s job! – Tell me; whose job is it to pick up trash in the parking lot? How much litter is in your parking lot, trapped against the fence, collecting around the dumpsters, and crowding the floors of your facility inside and out?
- A colleague states the following:
  - “I can tell you within five seconds after arriving the quality mindset of the facility I am visiting, by looking at the parking lot.”
- My colleague is correct; every facility I have visited that has had a clean parking lot, where employees and managers are picking up after themselves, has a quality culture worth emulation. Unfortunately, the reverse is also true!
- What does your parking lot look like?
Never take your customer, employee, shareholder, vendor, etc., where YOUR brain has not traveled first! – I sat in a meeting where the leader openly admitted, after telling the new strategic focus, goals, and mission plan, when answering questions about this plan regarding implementation, stated, “I haven’t thought that far ahead.” That company is bankrupt. Not because they did not have good products, customers willing to buy, or great service, but because the leadership took the business places they had not personally already traveled in their minds.
- How can you expect any goal to be achieved if you cannot answer implementation questions?
- How can people follow if you do not know where you are headed?
- Where are you going and has your brain already traveled there?
Data will be misinterpreted if specific explanations are not included! – New manager, fresh from school, knew all the lingo, had all the buzzwords memorized, was handed a sheet of data, and failed to comprehend what the data meant. Worse, he led others into ruin by misinterpreting data. If data is not explained, if the why behind data is not clearly understood, if the data story is incomplete, the data is useless, meaningless, and valueless!
- What is your data story?
- How do you train others in your data story?
- Can other people explain the why behind the data, or do they have to come to you for that explanation?
When in doubt, trust your people! – Time does not allow me to relate even a tenth of the stories where the people have proven the data wrong, have gone above and beyond expectations, and achieved miracles. Yet too often the people are the first ones cut in a crisis.
- Juran’s Rule – When something is going wrong, 90% of the time it is the process, not the people. Yet, how many times are the people blamed for bad processes?
- Appreciative Inquiry – The theory that states that when you have a problem, the people already in the positions doing the job, hold the answers needed to fixing the problems. Yet, how many times are the people the first one’s lost in crisis?
Data lies; humans live! – Recently the data stated that the problem in a facility was in a specific area. The specific area was encouraged to perform better. The management thought, “Problem solved.” Production goals were missed, more counseling to this specific area, more encouragement to achieve, more focused spending to target pain points. Still missed production goals. Nobody looked beyond what the data said was the problem, and the data was suffering from a pretty severe case of GIGO (Garbage In = Garbage Out). There was no production goal problem in the area specified, the problem was on the other side of the plant, and because of the investment in the wrong area, it took longer and more resources to fix the proper area.
- When data is purported to have “concluded” anything, first give it a reality check!
- Data is only as good as the inputs.
- Humans live in the real world, whereas data lives in an altered reality that mimics (rarely) the real world.
- Never forget, data lies. Data can, at best, only support a decision direction. Data cannot conclude, prove, or justify anything.
The Rule of 6-P’s – The Rule of 6-P’s is known in various forms and words, but the sentiment is always the same, “Proper, Prior, Planning, Prevents, Purely, Poor, Performance.” Yet, how often is planning done without proper prior activities? How often is poor performance blamed on everything but poor prior planning?
- Do you know what proper prior planning looks like as an activity?
- What is involved in prior planning, and how do you tell the difference between proper and improper prior planning?
- Who is involved in prior planning and why are they there?
Celebrate small achievements! – Here is another open secret, rarely implemented, always discounted, but remains the single most powerful tool in a leader’s toolbox, praise! That’s it. Praise is better than cash gifts for the brain, research and fMRI imagery support this conclusion. The research is fascinating. Yet, honest, regular, sincere praise continues to be the most overlooked aspect of leadership in business today!
- Praise is celebrating achievement with someone else.
- Celebrating success is imperative to moral, discipline, and enthusiasm in the workplace.
- When was the last time you showed genuine praise for your people? When was the last tangible “Thank you” witnessed? Who witnessed that gratitude, praise, and celebration?
- Mark Twain is quoted as saying, “I can live for two months on a good compliment.” Issue praise! Celebrate all achievements, but most of all celebrate the small achievements.
Success is a choice, but you need everyone making this choice! – Find me a successful team where one team member is not fully and wholly committed to achieving success, and I will show you a team that missed achieving the highest success. Production goals are the exact same thing, if everyone on the team does not know the goal, know the why, and are committed to achieving the production goal, that goal will be missed!
- How do you find the person not interested in achieving the production goal; who is dropping trash and not picking it up?
- What do you do when the person is identified; that depends, are you a learning organization or a money pit? If a money pit, that person is fired. If a learning organization, then it is time to ask questions, discover reasons, and explore options.
- How do you choose to lead, carrot or stick?
Success is designed; who is drawing the lines? – One of the most egregious problems in today’s world is the delegation of authority to those not worthy or capable. On a consultation the boss had delegated his role to an author of a book. Every question asked of the leader, he grabbed this author’s book and looked for an answer. The book is a good resource, but the lack of application to direct business problems was not the author’s intent and was beyond the authors ability.
- Who is drawing the lines designing what success looks like?
- Why?
The Pyramid Analogy – Use it, Live it, Love it!

The Pyramid Analogy

Consider the triangle from geometry, there are six different classifications, all of which demonstrate production goal attainment, but only the equilateral triangle makes up the pyramid, and only the equilateral triangle can report success in production goal attainment.

Right Triangles:

A right triangle has one 90° angle.

The Acute:

Acute triangle | Acute angled triangle
The Acute Triangle has three acute angles (an acute angle measure less than 90°).

The Obtuse:

Obtuse Angled Triangle | Formula and Properties | Solved Examples & Practice Questions
The Obtuse Triangle has an obtuse angle (an obtuse angle is more than 90°). Since the total degrees in any triangle is 180°, an obtuse triangle can only have one angle that measures more than 90°.

The Isosceles:

Properties of Isosceles Triangle - Definition & Solved Examples
The Isosceles triangle has two equal sides and two equal angles.

The Scalene:

Scalene Triangle (Definition, Area, Perimeter & Examples)
The Scalene Triangle has no congruent sides. In other words, each side must have a different length.

The Equilateral:

Properties of Equilateral Triangles | Brilliant Math & Science Wiki
The Equilateral triangle has three congruent sides and three congruent angles. Each angle is 60°.

The Pyramid is an interesting shape, it is self-replicating from a single equilateral triangle. The pyramid is a five-sided object that represents one of the strongest shapes in the galaxy, with integrity to flex without breaking and being destroyed. Did you know that if you drew straight lines inside the equilateral triangle, and bent the triangle along those lines, a pyramid would take shape?

Volume of a Pyramid - Assignment Point Consider the production environment and the variables generally fall into three categories, inbound, or products needed to make something for a customer; outbound, the product shipped to a customer; quality, the need to ensure the product is acceptable for the customer.

Using a right triangle, if outbound is the 90-degree angle, your quality is way out of reach, and inbound inputs and outbound deliveries are not being properly reviewed by quality. Thus, the production environment cannot function to its fullest potential, because all three, inbound, outbound, and quality, are not working equally together.

Bobblehead Doll Take any other triangle and the story is exactly the same. When the inbound and the outbound are not equally bound to quality, and quality is not equally bound to inbound and outbound, resources are not properly shared, time is wasted, and production goals will never be met! Arrange the variables anyway you prefer, and if the pattern is not an equilateral pattern, there is a problem in the production environment and production goals will be missed, opportunities, lost, and money follows potential right out the door.

Follow the rules and watch production meet goals almost by magic. Fail to follow the rules and production will continue to struggle. Production goals are effort incarnate, humans pump efforts in, looking for results. The goals are statistical symbols reporting success, failure, and percentages of improvement towards goals. At then end of the day, the human element is the only variable worthy of consideration in meeting production goals, and quality is the badge of honor in human efforts. Thus, quality is the tool that promotes production goal attainment.

The Power Found in Restraint – Appetite Control is Freedom!

Exclamation Mark There is a principle in life, “If you are not whole without something, you will never be whole with it.” Modern psychology will not teach restraint to gain freedom. It will often try to encourage a person to continue to do self-harm through their lifestyle while at the same time trying to find inner peace through the same lifestyle causing inner turmoil. Yet, natural law and common sense declare if what you are currently doing is causing you distress, stop what you are presently doing first.

Several times in my life, I have had the pleasure of working with people who have been in this crisis. All of these people are good people; I make no judgments about their lifestyle choices, moral codes, or desires. Simply making observations as compared to the principle under discussion. Bait & Switch 2

Person 1, male, arrives onboard the USS Barry, an American Aegis Destroyer about the same time as I. Works as a cook. A hard-working person expresses his innermost desire is to obtain a tattoo. It has always been his dream to have a single tattoo. He thinks it will make him tough. Upon return to America, he gets a tattoo, then another, and then several more. He gets off on the pain, but with every tattoo, his soul becomes more and more distressed and anguished, and he begins to hate his appearance simultaneously and desires more tattoos. Because he was never a complete person mentally, he will never be complete with a tattoo without a tattoo. He does not understand why something which gives him pleasure through pain is also causing him more mental and spiritual anguish.

Person 2, female, sailor from the USS Barry, born and raised in a Christian home, always harbored doubts about religion but never voiced them. She always considered religion to be a restraint on freedom. She joins the US Navy, cuts ties to the religion of her youth, and claims she has never been freer. Her promiscuity is the stories of legends told in the engine rooms and back passageways of the ship. Her friends on board are scared she will crash and burn on some port visit and find a dead body where their friend used to be. This sailor thought sex would be the ultimate expression of freedom. Instead, it became the chains of her demise mentally, physically, and spiritually. When I met her, very little remained of the modest and good person she had been as she was growing up; by the time I left the ship, she was unrecognizable.

Two very good people, quick to help, hard-working, people of different backgrounds, but essentially the same. They discovered the same truth through two very different means, and the truth had nearly broken them when I left the ship. I grieve for my colleagues and their friends. By not knowing who they were and understanding their potential, the added freedoms and responsibilities of becoming adults were not the freedoms they expected but chains by which they bound themselves to paths of pain and destruction.

The Paradox

A paradox is anything that initially appears to be two opposing forces, but when studied, they are not opposites but are closer related than opposites. For example, one of the principles in understanding oneself and enjoying freedom is accepting restraints. Case in point, using person 2, had she exercised the modesty discussed in the religion of her youth, she would have found that sexual relations are improved with restraint, not ruined with discretion. Lies spread in society since the 1960s have claimed that sex is free, has no consequences, and can be engaged in without concern. All of these are absurd lies leading to the destruction of everyone who listens and becomes engrossed in the lifestyle of free sex. Hence, sexual restraint is a paradox; practicing restraint in sexual relations improves sexual relations, not hinders them, a contradiction, and freedom is found in restraint.

Person 3 has been observed the longest and is a family member, one of my younger brothers, to be precise. He has lived his life in a manner that has seen him restrained by external forces because he refuses internal restraint—losing good companions as wives, relationships with children, friends, and colleagues along the way. All of which has been difficult to witness, but the real tragedy has been the hero-worship heaped upon my younger brother by other more youthful siblings, leading them into dangerous and difficult paths. Hence, you could call Person 3 an amalgamate of four of my younger siblings, all of whom have chosen paths of appetite fulfillment instead of appetite suppressant. Remember

By choosing to engage in appetite fulfillment, each of them has chased his one preferred appetite, to the exclusion of other all else, usually to the detriment of spousal relationships, children relationships, familial bonds, and responsibilities to society and themselves. Worse, the shell of these people forms a prickly wall around genuinely good people, who, if they would choose to learn, could be taught appetite suppression.

Training is Contingent Upon Choosing to Learn

One of the most difficult lessons I have learned is that those who choose to learn will, and those who choose to refuse to learn will as well. Nothing a teacher can do will change a student’s mind once it is made to refuse to learn. Unfortunately, this means that the teacher will witness a lot of struggles in the student, watch the student experience consequences, and be harmed physically and mentally from the choices made to refuse to learn.

Andragogy - LEARN Believe it or not, appetite control is a choice and begins with a desire to learn. The paradox in training is that when the desire to learn is stronger than the appetite to remain ignorant, the learner will produce the effort to change through learning. This is why appetite control is such a critical and fundamental topic for understanding. Desire is appetite, an appetite is a tool for good or ill, and bridling an appetite is every person’s job if they choose self-mastery as a means of self-regulation and self-improvement. When we choose self-mastery, we choose to become free!

Freedom is a paradox of bridled appetites to the greater realization that through suppressed appetite and controlled desires, a person can enjoy more, not less. Can learn and experience more, have more, become more, and realize more potential. Long have I been fascinated with racehorses, and the story of Black Beauty is one of my all-time favorites.

How Black Beauty Gave Animals a Voice - ilovehorses.net How are the best racehorses made? Sure, breeding helps. But, training is as, if not more, crucial. A good animal does not become a great animal until they are placed into the hands of a good trainer who puts restraints upon the animal. A bridle, a harness, a saddle, wrap their legs to protect against ligament strain, shoes on their feet, and much more. Then over time, the animal learns that the restraints, which at first were chafing and fought against, become the tools by which the horse achieves greatness. The same is true for humans, every human, and those who, throw the restraints, never achieve freedom, never achieve excellence, and refuse their potential for momentary happiness, all because of appetite.

Living in a representative government, the citizenry needs to understand this lesson and monitor those elected for people who refuse restraint. Those who refuse restraint will gather everyone who chooses to take a lazy route to their side, and in doing so, will ruin the representative government and destroy liberty for all. The debt so many representative governments face right now, which has reached critical mass stages, is due to unbridled appetite and appetite fulfillment for the masses when the government needed appetite restraint instead. The world’s problems in Afghanistan where rampant appetite fulfillment for the masses when appetite restraint was required. Terrorism is nothing but an unbridled appetite mixed with modern weapons and a desire to watch the world burn, more unbridled appetites.

Knowledge Check! Do we understand that only through restraining our appetites can we personally enjoy freedom? Do we teach appetite restraint to our children, knowing that when they control themselves, they can enjoy freedom, and help them to understand why appetite restraint is a good thing? Do we exemplify appetite restraint in society in speech, clothes, manners and encourage others to do similarly? If not, why?

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